Tuesday, February 10, 2009

When You Can't Take It With You

Here it is.... the day has come, John and I leave tomorrow morning.  I don't have the energy to say much (even though it has been some time since I have said much at all), but I leave you with 2 struggles:
1.  I want you to look around  your apartment, house, and family and now I want you to imagine packing everything up into twelve, no more than 50 pound suitcases, to take with you to your next location.  Oh, and those twelve are for you and your 4 closest family or friends.....  I know this sounds like a complaint, and I am not meaning it to, I recognize that this is a sacrifice that we are willing to make, and I would do it again..... BUT, I found myself crying over the silliest things, or arguing with John over trivial items because the found themselves on my most valuable list.....
Have you ever thought about what you would take with you, what are really some of the most valuable or meaningful items around you?  I broke it down into three categories:  personal (clothing for me and the family), necessary (some of your basic kitchen items and office items) and then super meaningful, items that will remind you of your humanness when times are a challenge (like pivotal bible studies, special notes from the kids or a few pictures of dear friends).  This have been an emotional trying time.  The good news, it is complete.  We leave tomorrow with the "chosen" ones, leaving about 18 luggage pieces in storage for another trip and 12 that will be sent down with others in the next six months.  At this point, I feel unemotional and dry.....   BUT again, the Lord is good and the sacrifice is worth the joy of obedience!
2.  Did you forget I had two?  I have had some more moments that I would like to call "Burning Bush Moments"....  I have been reminded of Moses standing before the burning bush and the Lord has called him to lead the Israelites out of captivity and Moses says no, no, they won't listen to me, or why would they follow me, send another....  and God ultimately says to Moses, tell them "I AM" sent you... interesting isn't it?  he doesn't say don't worry moses I have trained you well, or no you can do it, just believe in yourself.... He simply says, tell them "I AM" sent you....  So as I look at the huge continent of AFrica and say to myself  no, no, they won't listen to us they don't even know us, or why would anyone trust us, maybe someone else is more qualified  I hear the Lord gently reminding John and I, "don't worry my children, "I AM" is sending you.... and I sense His overwhelming completeness....  I think I would feel better if He would say hey, you have had some good training, or look back at your experience or you know what Corrie, I have gifted you, but I think again that would most likely be a short term peace, not one that is eternal and perfect in all circumstances....  I hope not to lose these burning bush moments as I want to rely not on anything of me, but just know I AM.
I think I need to call it quits tonight.  We leave tomorrow!!!
Thank you for being our friends and family.  We love you!


  1. We love you, Guckenbergers and will be praying boldly(especially on Wed/Thurs during travel and arrival) for your family and all of the amazing things that are in store in Nigeria. Your obedience is inspiring!

    The Chandlers

  2. You've always been so good at being transparent Corrie!! We'll continue lifting you up during this transition. Oh, and Gabe wishes Gus lived next door. So, think about that on your next move!:) JK! LOVE, The Thomases

  3. Cannot wait to read about your arrival to Nigeria! Take comfort and find peace in the Lord, knowing that we (and so many others) are praying for your family--as you travel, unpack, and settle in to what God has in store there. We love you!

    Betsy & Brett

  4. I got whispy eyed hearing you guys on the phone this morning. We are praying.

  5. You are a great blogger. Loved hearing your voice and your kids. Our boys miss your kids. Praying for safe travels and all that God has for you. Love you

  6. Gosh, what a great entry. We miss you guys a ton but trust that "I AM" is carrying you. I totally heard that song this am in the car (an oldie, but the words are awesome) and thought of you. How weird. God is so cool. I will be praying for more burning bush moments for you. I think of you daily because your car is nestled in our driveway. Chad keeps smelling the seats to remember all his adventures with John those last few days before you left - isn't that weird? Just kidding. :) We love you guys and expect much from our GREAT GOD who is before you, with you, and behind you. Love to you all!