Later that day, John and I were driving towards our village and I was kind of just in my own little world thinking about whatever came to my mind. In that moment, I started marveling at the fact that I love this season of my life. In this moment, John and I have three kids which are all in elementary school, they are independent enough to dress themselves, feed themselves if needed, work on their schoolwork (and John and I at this point can still help), but yet not independent enough to just go to a friends house real late and drive home by curfew, etc... Not only are our kids at the perfect age but I love our two guards that are on our property. They are Christian young men who just fit with us, and we are adjusting to Nigeria and life is content.
In the very next moment, I was reminded of Sami's comment about not wanting the weather to change. I want that also, but this season. It is hard because I know my kids will get older, and the parenting role will need to change as they change, our guards truly will not want to be with us forever, they have their whole lives ahead of them, ministry will always be rearranging as more staff and more groups come and I will be forced to change with them. That is not bad, just I want "today" to last forever. What is it in me that wants moments to last forever? I know some of you reading this might wish your season to end this very moment so the next one can start fresh.... Isn't that funny? We want to push forward, or we want to hold on to what just took place.
God never changes, Sami was right, and I guess that is the one thing we can count on to remain the same today, yesterday and for sure, tomorrow. So, I guess whether it is the weather, circumstances, seasons, etc... I can for sure rely on the Lord to never change and I hope to always find peace and joy in that... that no matter what season I find myself, that part of me will never change.... the part that seeks God in the season in the moment.
Hmmmm, God Bless,
P.S. I had a youth pastor many, many years ago accuse me of never stopping with my thoughts and he asked me if I could just "put it on hold" for a moment to let him breathe. I am realizing no, I cannot stop, my thoughts are always cluttered with these ideas and parallels. I know it might be crazy and you might be tired of blog entries that are dealing with the thoughts in my head verses just about living in Africa. It is just me realizing that it is okay. It is good for me to get them out of my head and onto this version of paper... thanks for reading and helping me sleep better at night because of it....