Wednesday, January 25, 2012

not who I am but who He is

I like looking at these photos because they bring peace to my heart. These pictures are located in KY along these trails that our family was hiking a few months ago. There was no one around and it was quiet and it was just us, nature and a few birds chirping along the way.

This is my personality at its core. I don't mind being busy, don't mind having to rush around to meet different needs, but in truth, if I stay that way too long something breaks down. I think I referred to this process in an earlier email.

I definitely feel as if I am a minority. The enemy can convince me in moments that this trait makes me boring or I am weak in my lack of abilities. I continually must remind myself that yes, I can strive to be more of who I am in Christ... but I must not strive to be more of who the world wants me to be, even the well-meaning world.

Lately, if I would allow myself I can become in a panic at the mere thought of some things. Truly I feel as if I am a thought away from a mental breakdown. Why? Nothing really worthy of a breakdown, but much thought going on in my head nonetheless. BUT, I was looking at these pictures today while at the same time remembering that I have the choice to take a step back and trust the Lord with each minute, each thought... and when I take the time to recognize this and allow the Spirit full control again, I am able to swallow and move forward in the confidence of His ability and His calling in the moment.

So, once again I am reminded even if I am weak, it will be this weakness that shows He is strong. In the end, it doesn't really matter who I am but really it matters who He is! Praise God!

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