Uncovered

not who I am but who He is

2012-01-25T14:09:00.000-08:00

I like looking at these photos because they bring peace to my heart. These pictures are located in KY along these trails that our family was hiking a few months ago. There was no one around and it was quiet and it was just us, nature and a few birds chirping along the way.

This is my personality at its core. I don't mind being busy, don't mind having to rush around to meet different needs, but in truth, if I stay that way too long something breaks down. I think I referred to this process in an earlier email.

I definitely feel as if I am a minority. The enemy can convince me in moments that this trait makes me boring or I am weak in my lack of abilities. I continually must remind myself that yes, I can strive to be more of who I am in Christ... but I must not strive to be more of who the world wants me to be, even the well-meaning world.

Lately, if I would allow myself I can become in a panic at the mere thought of some things. Truly I feel as if I am a thought away from a mental breakdown. Why? Nothing really worthy of a breakdown, but much thought going on in my head nonetheless. BUT, I was looking at these pictures today while at the same time remembering that I have the choice to take a step back and trust the Lord with each minute, each thought... and when I take the time to recognize this and allow the Spirit full control again, I am able to swallow and move forward in the confidence of His ability and His calling in the moment.

So, once again I am reminded even if I am weak, it will be this weakness that shows He is strong. In the end, it doesn't really matter who I am but really it matters who He is! Praise God!

work

2012-01-19T05:52:00.001-08:00

Just a little update...

We have bought a home AND I have been asked by Back2Back to fill in a gap in the home office for the next few months, part time. So, we move in a week and a half... and I am working 4 days a week with hours that are perfectly in between the kids school hours.

I feel blessed and nervous all at the same time...

More later, just wanted to get this out there for whatever reason.

Have a great day!

uncovered conviction

2012-01-17T03:53:00.000-08:00

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

There is something in these words that today has stirred my heart. I am praying for the Lord to show me why...

uncovered legalism

2012-01-12T07:56:00.000-08:00

I am finishing a bible study called "Gospel Transformation" and it has been just excellent for me. Anyway, today's thought was the idea of legalism and how it can lead to lack of joy and bondage. I just thought I would put up a list they had because I love it so much. Enjoy!

20 reasons why legalism saps the joy out of life

1. Legalism substitutes loving our neighbor with loving ourselves.

2. Legalism substitutes humility with pride.

3. Legalism substitutes a heart relationship with Jesus with external conformity.

4. Legalism substitutes honesty with pretense.

5. Legalism substitutes God’s approval with people’s expectations.

6. Legalism substitutes burden-bearing with burden-giving.

7. Legalism substitutes the power of the Spirit with the powerlessness of rules.

8. Legalism substitutes innocence with guilt.

9. Legalism substitutes the gentle Lord with a hard taskmaster.

10. Legalism substitutes sonship with slavery.

11. Legalism substitutes accepting God’s love with earning God’s love.

12. Legalism substitutes the joy of repentance with the remorse of lingering sin.

13. Legalism substitutes liberty with bondage.

14. Legalism substitutes Christ’s righteousness with self-righteousness.

15. Legalism substitutes kindness and gentleness with forcing, demanding, and compelling.

16. Legalism substitutes the law of Christ with a perverted use of laws.

17. Legalism substitutes the freedom to love with unlimited obligation.

18. Legalism substitutes encouragement with biting and devouring.

19. Legalism substitutes relationship with alienation.

20. Legalism substitutes free grace for a manipulation of God’s grace.

Enjoy your day living in freedom!

uncovered heart

2012-01-11T06:13:00.001-08:00

This photo represents to me our family vacation to NC: (in case you cannot tell what it represents fully, let me share with you) - memories, food, family time, laughter, beach/hiking, card playing, etc... were you able to get all of that from this beach photo? :)

Now, vacation is finished and a new year has begun and with the whirlwind of those days gone by, I realize that I have had a lot of great times, but have missed the heart of daily spending time with God.

First, I realize there is grace upon grace because of Jesus so these thoughts are not full of condemnation as much as a bigger awareness of missing my Lord and Savior. I have been reminded through the Holy Spirit that there is nothing that can replace the intimacy I am allowed to enter through the Scriptures! This heart reminder has given me back balance, love for others, peace, freedom and genuine humility of finding my place once again in the perspective of God's view.

I am thankful for this reminder and often wonder why I am so surprised when I am reminded of how God is the lover of my soul. So, a wonderful family vacation honoring God is good. But, I am excited to once again jump into the land of the other living and give His goodness away.

2012

2012-01-02T11:05:00.001-08:00

Happy New Year!!

I don't have much to add at this current moment except that I do desire to see some things change in my life for the year 2012...

But, probably most grateful that I know I don't have to because God's mercy is new every morning. AND, I am already new in Him.

May my praise be true to the Lord all year long!

uncovered Corrie

2011-12-21T08:30:00.000-08:00

As Christmas quickly approaches, I find myself realizing a ton about Jesus being born to ultimately die for us and that with that death, comes a newness of person. A newness of character and identity. A newness that has me also reflecting and contemplating the New Year.

Looking back at my life, there are a few points that characterize somewhat who I became - for example, I moved around a lot, I learned to become quickly everybody's friend, I learned how to feel out a room and figure out what was really going on and learned how to somewhat fly under the radar enough not to draw attention to myself - too much.

With that being one of the strongest consistencies, I realized that with those things, I was a chameleon, in some regards. I can and was able to blend into any environment that I was thrown into. Some would call this a gift, maybe an ease that not all possess. But, now finishing my 30's, starting a new season of life in the USA and growing a ton with the Lord I am seeing the downfall of this gift/trait.

There are times when blending in is exactly what is needed and what I should do, but then there are other times, when a shout out is called for and a conviction is needed to be stood firm on and I find myself in new territory. I never learned the trait of making bold decisions that ruffle others feathers. I didn't need to before, I was the new one and I was busy making friends. But, now the Lord is truly revealing to me basic Corrie traits that are in me and He is asking me to start being who He is wanting me to be in this season and with His identity. And I struggle and flounder and find myself failing to do just that, at times.

Oh goodness, when I am just who I am, it is awkward, kind of weird, not always likeable and sometimes just plain embarrassing. But, who cares, really, right? Nothing has changed about my identity, my eternal plans... so why do I care and add the stress to myself? Ughhh, but again, it is good to start realizing I have a voice and a voice that matters to God.

So, in an effort to be forthcoming, let me share with you a few things about who Corrie is and some things that she is finding she really likes... (some of these were new to me, others were not)

I like to have fun and laugh,

I love women bible studies and studying the Scriptures with other women,

I also like naps and early bedtimes, with the occasional late night card competition,

I enjoy seeing respectful children and kids who are willing to be different.

I love my family more than anything and genuinely desire to serve them more than I do,

I love my intimate friends closely after my family,

I am not good with politics and get easily confused,

I have the ability to be extremely awkward, so much so that it rubs off on people by me and they cringe... :)

I do not always enjoy political correctness, I think it is the american way of not being honest with ourselves...,

I have a quick anger trigger with bullies and have a heart for the underdog,

I can feel inadequate around people who are overconfident,

I can get my feelings hurt when I feel I am being taken advantage of while at the same time would lay down my life for a friend in true need (notice my word true, just trying to be honest),

I really enjoy chocolate and eat it too much at times,

I like being fit and healthy while at the same time find myself not going to the dr. unless under extreme symptoms for fear of looking foolish and like one of those women who "always is sick",

I like the size of my family,

I am becoming less grateful with passing years and want to see this change,

I sometimes do things that others don't like, but I see they hang in there with me anyway and it has shown me that I can learn to trust more in my friendships and less in myself,

and to end it today, I am learning there is so much more to God than I will ever understand, but I desire to know Him!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all of you who probably know yourselves more than you think...!

uncovered quietness

2011-12-12T08:35:00.000-08:00

Isaiah 32:17

The fruit of righteousness will be peace; the effect of righteousness

will be quietness and confidence forever.

I woke up this morning with an anxiety that kept growing and growing. Lots of thoughts going through my mind and realizing that my anxiety is stemmed from others opinions of me. It is such a challenge to want people to see the best in you, even though it is not what is always shown.

Even worse, people who don't know you and don't know your character are liable to jump to wrong conclusions and my instant desire is to defend myself, over-tell what is going on in my mind, or over exaggerate the opposite of what they think of you. Does any of this make sense?

So, as I was thinking about what these certain people might be thinking of me, this verse showed up on my computer screen. Immediately I felt a peace, an inside peace only found with the Lord. I then realized that even if I am not able to explain myself ever to these people, it will be okay. The quietness and confidence found in righteousness is better than a temporary confidence in explaining myself. So, maybe there will be people who have the wrong idea of me forever - don't get me wrong, bummer, right? BUT, even if that is the scenario, it will be okay and I can learn and grow and trust the Lord more. The challenge will be for me to stay faithful to a lifestyle of righteousness in the Lord moment by moment.

On a side note, I also found it interesting that it was easier for me to have people misunderstand me in a foreign culture than I am having people misunderstand me here. Maybe it is because I maybe felt most of the time people didn't understand me so it became a lifestyle. Nothing unsual, but here, there is a bigger stigma in my own heart and mind... hmmmm, something to think about.

Anyway, have a great day and here's hoping to no misunderstandings, but if there are, quietness and confidence are within reaching distance with the Lord.

uncovered simplicity with money

2011-12-09T09:19:00.000-08:00

I have been living here long enough to have learned that everything costs money. Nothing new with that idea, but what is new to me is ALL the ways you can save money. To the point, I have a feeling that it is actually getting people to spend money that they usually wouldn't, in order to SAVE money.

For those who know me, you know that I enjoy simplicity. Simplicity in lifestyle, in material items, in friendships, in daily routine. I am not one of those women who enjoys a hectic day nor am I the woman who can multi-task AT ALL!! I cannot, even if you multi-task in front of me, you will see me break out into a sweat. You can ask any of my friends (which by the way, I know of no other woman who cannot multi-task - there have to be more out there, right?).

SO, with that being said, I do have a heart to save money and be wise with what we have. BUT, this idea that every single place you go you have the opportunity to join their club and save money and earn rewards and earn special discounts or FREE money to their desired store. UGHHHH, I literally cannot stand it. Let me tell you what it does to me as a simple kind of woman. These little clubs are cluttering my email, cluttering my real mail, they have trapped me mentally in going out and using the discounts that I have been SO LUCKY to have been asked to be a part of... ugh, it literally clutters my mind, my day and I do not enjoy it at all.

So, this past week I have spent every single morning, unsubscribing to every bit of email I receive that is not personal. I am also getting rid of cards and mailings and whatever else I can find to declutter my mind.

I am guessing that some of you are thinking that by doing this, I am choosing to waste money. AND, maybe at some point, I will be mature enough to handle the junk, but right now, I cannot and I refuse to be a victim of the money saving scandal.... okay, I am being harsh, but that type of behavior is what happens to us simple women, we slowly erode mentally bit by bit until we SNAP and then we read in the papers about shootings after material items... I know I am just one step away from utter destruction.

WIth that being said, I joined a store's "card" just yesterday because it would save me 20% ofo my purchases that I was making that morning. Bummer, one week of great steps forward to come crashing down to another moment of simplistic weakness....

Oh well, tomorrow is a new day!

uncovered celebrations

2011-11-28T10:44:00.000-08:00

Sami's 10th birthday party. She is opening up a "craft" bin gift!

John's ? birthday. The kids have been begging him for a dog, and of course, we keep saying no, so this is their version of buying him one. It is an ice cream cake, and it was delicious!

This has been a crazy couple of weeks as we have had two birthdays, Thanksgiving and one more birthday to go this week. Lots of celebrations and things to rejoice in... As a family, we try to focus on the "experience" of the celebration verses the gifts of celebrations. Not that gifts are bad, because we know they are not. However, I have found that I can easily get trapped in the mentality of the gift/gifts and what their friends are receiving and will my children like it, will they think their friends will like it, etc...

As I type it, it feels kind of silly really. BUT, truly it can feel like a box to live under instead of a moment to be celebrated! Truly I am proud of my children. They expect I am sure one gift, but other than that, they expect a family moment. One to be remembered and stored in our memory banks to be thought about another day...

I do hope your Thanksgiving was full of celebration and thanks and family and friends. As I desire to live "uncovered", I realize that it can be hard to celebrate every moment, but today I will try as I will again tomorrow and then I will try the next day, and so on, I am sure you get the idea.

Have a great day!

a new beginning

2011-11-22T12:09:00.000-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving friends!

For those of you who know me, know that I am pretty transparent with my life. My hope is that this blog will be a little outlet for me to learn to live in an american culture openly and uncovered.

I have to go though at this current moment to welcome my kids home from school, but for now, have a great Holiday week and enjoy the people that you find yourself surrounded by... I know that I will.

Partnership with Guckenberger Family

2011-11-12T08:34:00.001-08:00

Hello family and friends,

To look back over these past seven years, it has been such a whirlwind of trust, faith, fears, concerns, and more than anything relationship! Relationship with our staff family, relationship with those we ministered to in Mexico and Nigeria and most importantly our relationships with each of you.

We are overjoyed to share with you that John has received a job that he is so excited about and the Lord has really revealed to us. He started November 1^st, with his last day in the Back2Back offices being October 31^st. We wanted to thank you one last time as you have been on this whirlwind with us the entire time. John is the new project manger of Life Enriching Community. LEC is a world class leader in senior living. John will be managing various construction projects at the LEC Twin Lakes Campus and Twin Towers Campus.

As one chapter in our life closes and another one begins, we find ourselves again in a whirlwind of trust, faith, fears, concerns and yet this time, without each of you. BUT, we do know this, God is with us and we hope and pray that He will continue to lay the burden on your heart to continue to pray for us as He guides us into new relationships with neighbors, parents of children’s friends, and whomever else the Lord sees fit for us to be ministering alongside and to. He is good to us, this we know!

Please continue to consider supporting another staff family, program or child within Back2Back ministries as the work is far from over. Thank you for partnering with us as we “Cared for Today, Hoped for Tomorrow” for these Fatherless. John and I can both sincerely say we have loved working with each of you.

Because there are numerous opportunities to continue your partnership with Back2Back, we would like to recommend that your prayers and financial support go toward our home office staff, in particular Chris Ramos. He is the Director of Missions and he has been a faithful servant for the past four years with Back2Back. As you probably know, it is much more difficult for U.S. staff to raise support, and your partnership would be a huge benefit.

We are always interested in connecting with each of you so please call us or email us with any questions or just to connect. Email: corriejohn@yahoo.com, John’s ph: 513-502-8830.

Thank you again and God Bless,

John and Corrie Guckenberger

a few things not missed

2011-10-05T13:00:00.000-07:00

Just to remind myself that things aren't always as perfect as you remember, I saw a friend's fb page and was quickly reminded of some things I don't miss about living in Nigeria....

1. head wraps

2. no consistent power

3. having to put all clothes on a clothes line, rain or shine (the kids are cute, huh?)

4. traffic that takes the Christ right out of me... (is that bad to say, you understand what I mean, right?)

5. flying bugs that overtake our home as they crawl under the doors and through our windows

6. flat, huge, crab spiders

7. Let's go ahead and end today's list with having to home-make all meals from scratch, every day, three times a day....

I think this is a good list so far. Again, these aren't entirely horrible things, but things that I just don't miss...

The grass isn't alway greener on the other side... A valuable lesson in life!

the loss of an old life, a birth of a new one

2011-10-04T05:50:00.000-07:00

This is the Africa I last remember! It is funny how six months later, I am finding myself already in a place of only remembering the "good and fun" parts of life there. The sights, smells and sounds of memories lived fully!

I was at church on Sunday missing our village church ladies singing unto the Lord! It made me want to take note and remind myself of some of those memories and think about them for a bit. So I will begin to do just that and be grateful for the time spent as a foreigner in a far away continent!

Beginning list of things missed in Jos, Nigeria

1. Village church worship

2. walking in the market and choosing something to eat with only a few choices in front of me

3. being such a foreigner allowed me the deepness in friendships to reveal themselves early on

4. evening times spent as a family playing games

5. naturally living out biblical commands

6. simplicity in schedule

7. ah, one of my favorites - their German white cheddar cheese blocks! yum, yum

8. the warmth (man is it cold here)

9. I guess the familiarity of being a foreigner and automatically being different than those around you

This is just the beginning and I am so glad for those experiences as I am also glad for the ones before me not yet lived! There is a lot of life in me and a lot to give. John and I talk about how different we are now. People on the outside might not see the differences right away, but they are there and I am confident that the changes are to prepare us for what is yet to come.

With that, I move forward missing what is gone but anticipating what is yet to come. I choose to grab on to this new day and live it! Death is a part of life. The death of what was - the death of an old self, an old relationship, of what you thought something was meaning, maybe even a death of a perception, etc... I am sure we can all fill in that list with our own deaths. I really do believe that the better we learn to handle death, the better we are able to live the life in front of us without missing those moments, those brief but always available moments to serve the person in front of my face!

The Guckenberger's Family update

2011-10-03T05:51:00.001-07:00

Family and Friends,

Hello to our family and friends! We regret how long it has been since we have given you an update. Especially since I have paused on the blog which was such a great way to communicate what God was doing with us and B2B. Please know that we have been praying for you all as we are ever reminded of our partnership with each of you. During these past four months being in the USA, we have enjoyed taking the time to connect with some of you in person. Thanks for taking the time to have lunch, dinner, or just visit on a not so

long distance phone call.

As you all know, John has been working in the home office for the last four months, on “home assignment”. During this time, we have been in prayer seeking an answer to where we might serve next with Back2Back and continue the ministry we’ve felt so passionate about for the last seven years.

As the conclusion of our home assignment time has drawn closer, we have been sensing that God is leading us in a different direction and so we have decided to leave B2B staff.

Before moving to Mexico with Back2Back, John fulfilled a construction manager role. In the next few months, he will begin to pursue employment again in this fi

eld. His passion that he has been educated in, that the Lord has blessed him with, and that he continues to enjoy so much is with construction and all its varying roles. He and I are very much on the same page with this change and couldn’t be more excited to see what God has next.

Where specifically God is leading we are not sure. We just know we need to make the necessary room for Him to show us where that next step is to serve Him elsewhere.

We have been blessed ten fold by God through the ministry of Back2Back. We have not only had the opportunity to serve in the role of orphan care, but we have been served by so many of you who have locked arms and partnered, cared, prayed, financially supported and loved on our family for the past seven years. It has been a gift given to us that is not taken for granted. We are now leaving the ministry as different people than when w

e began. For this, we are thankful!

Here is the plan:

John will be looking for new employment while continuing with B2B in the home office. There is much to do and this will allow John to bring closure and transition to a number of projects for which he is currently responsible.

Our desire is to transition out of B2B by the end of October, but much of this timing is based on John finding a new job. Until that time, John will continue

to serve the ministry. In order to help make this transition, we ask that you remain in financial partnership with us through the end of November.

We want to continue to be open with each of you so if there are any questions in regards to what we are communicating, please email us at corriejohn@yahoo.com. We would love to hear from each of you. We will continue to keep you up to date with our changes as they occur and let you know the final date that we are leaving B2B. We are blessed by each of you and grateful for your prayers.

Thank you and God Bless,

John and Corrie Guckenberger

P.S.

Please know that the ministry is continuing to invest in the lives of orphans by God’s provisions through the generosity of supporters like you. Our desire is that you would look at this opportunity to partner with Back2Back in a new way.

By shifting your financial support to another staff member (all staff raise their support), a program, or to assist any of the children’s homes or communities in which we have served, you’ll be continuing your important partnership with the ministry.

Of course, you can also give generally which allows B2B to meet specific needs at any of our ministry sites as they arise. If you don’t feel led to continue to support the ministry, that’s perfectly fine too! We welcome any questions you might have in regards to this.

One last running analogy

2011-06-20T05:10:00.000-07:00

Before I get into my running analogy, I just thought I would give you some photos showing how the last couple of months have been filled.
Lots of family time, siblings, grandparents, past friendships along with some new friendships and visiting varying churches that have been a part of our lives while overseas for the last few years.
We are so grateful for each one of these times and relationships.

The picture of Gus being tied up is just one way my children have been amusing themselves. If any of you are thinking, "ahhh, poor Gus." Don't. He deserves it most of the time. :)

John and I were running this morning. We are starting to find a routine in our running outings again since living in Montgomery. We run at least two or three mornings together while having other avenues of running the rest of the week.

Since moving here, in Montgomery, we have found a path that suits us both. It is about a five mile run down major streets, through neighborhoods and over bridges, etc... It works for us, but the other hard part for me personally is that there are a few times where we need to cross over major roads. We run real early, so for the most part not an issue, but occasionally when we cross, there just happens to be that ONE car that is cruising down the street at 6am. Usually what happens is that John will say, "Let's go and cross now." which at that point, I usually turn my head, check the surroundings and my visuals (hard for me to see that early and with my eyesight failing more often than not), then stutter my start due to my own risk assessment. Most of the time, it causes frustrations because I assess risk differently than he does and maybe we should have crossed earlier or later than what he was suggesting.

HOWEVER, today I mentally thought I am not going to check at all when he communicates that it is time to cross over the road, I will just trust that he loves me and he has my best interest and move forward as he suggests. Well, it was great. No stress on my part, no frustration on his part and we continued running in a smooth pattern.

WELL, lo and behold, it dawned on me. I wonder how much I do that to the Lord? He says to me, "Corrie, it is time to cross over" and then I look to see what the risk will be and then move forward as to what I deem safe and timely. I think I do it a lot, in so many little areas. And, especially now while John and I are waiting on the Lord for direction. I am sitting back in my bedroom assessing. Assessing what would work best for the kids, or what might be best for John or what would best use my skill set, etc... there is no end to my assessing.

I think some of you might be thinking now, "wait, Corrie, God calls us to wisdom and using our brains." I know that, but I am coming from the perspective of overusing our minds and wisdom to a point where we can logically "hault" when God calls us to "move" with no regard to the risk assessment because truly God has a different definition of risk than we do, but even more importantly for me to remember is that God loves me and ultimately has His people's best interest in mind all the time.

Believe it or not, this was a big "ah hah" moment for me. Almost a burden lifted. My only responsibility during this period is to wait and continue running where I can until He tells me to cross over. AND, when He does, I need to just cross over and continue to follow the one who loves me and will give me whatever it is I need in whatever moment I need it.

Isn't running great?!

One last thought, this is my last blog entry for awhile. I am sensing the need to close it down. Thank you to you readers out there. I have enjoyed hearing from you. When we know what is next for us, I will blog about it and we will be sending out an old fashioned newsletter for those of you who support us to receive. Please continue to let me know what is going on, whether through commenting on this blog or sending me personal emails. I love it. corriejohn@yahoo.com

If you want to support us and become a partner in the cause for the orphan, please send me an email as well, and I can let you know the options before you.

In the meanwhile, continue running and enjoy each step! God Bless!

a revelation that brought a right peace

2011-06-07T06:19:00.001-07:00

Does that title even make sense, really?

Officially, we are moved into our last home (for awhile anyway). The kids are gone spending time with grandparents and John and I are getting away as a couple for a few days at a place called Innkeepers. I am excited to spend some time looking face to face at my husband without the challenge of having purposeful conversations around the children. I am sure a few of you understand and know what I am saying.

We have had a lot of questions asked our way recently wondering if the Lord had brought any clarity to our future. We have been here/home a couple of months and curiousity is peaked, not only from others but from John and I as well. As if it was some exciting adventure that the world deems exciting and adventurous is awaiting us around the "decision" bend. Don't get me wrong anywhere the Lord leads our family will truly be exciting and adventurous. It just might not be the world's definition of "exciting and adventurous". There is a distinction! I don't want to disappoint what others are expecting, right?

As I was working through bible study this morning, I came to a peaceful realization that so much of self (well really all of it) springs: self-justification, self-glorification, self-deception, and self-gratification. BUT, the key is to return my eyes to the Lord. I cannot be overcome by my "self" but what I can do is be overcome every single morning by the Lord and his mercies and moment by moment make choices of obedience, no matter how boring, how mundane, how not exciting they may seem to others and myself.

Just this thought alone, created in my heart a serenity of peace. Maybe I don't have the future planned and as much as I would like to create something exciting to tell people of what the future might hold, I cannot. We just don't know, yet. So, this morning I will obey and live a day that brings God honor, glory and praise. And if at some point, my eyes turn toward "self", I will humbly regain the proper gaze and move forward again and again and again.

I pray you do the same as well. Not for other's sake, but for the glory of the Lord!

pursuing Christ through pretense

2011-06-03T08:02:00.000-07:00

I was asked the question this week in the bible study, Gospel Transformation, "Where do you pretend?" It was going through the idea of pretense and how we all, in some way, shape or form, put out a pretense to others for various reasons. If you think about it, it is a really loaded question. Where do I pretend? The truth is, I do pretend sometimes. I hope not all the time, nor even most of the time.... but I do have my moments when I do.

It has been so good for me to realize my own pretense as I think about pursuing Christ more authentically. A dear, close friend of mine in Jos wrote me an email a bit ago and I reread it today and it was what I needed to hear.

"Remember that your goal is the pursuit of Christ, not the pursuit of missions. Despite all the amazing things Paul did, he said “this one thing I do…” and that was to pursue Christ. If pursuing Christ means making a change, it will be sad and you will grieve the change, but be comforted that it does not mean you are not being faithful to God or are not serving/obeying him."

As this time of transition moves forward and as I keep my eyes focused on the Author and Perfecter of my faith, change might be what naturally happens, and it is okay. Where do I pretend? I pray it is never in my own walk before the Lord.

permanently temporary

2011-05-25T08:14:00.000-07:00

Well, we are officially moving to our permanently temporary home this weekend. As a family, we are all excited for the final phase of our transition process.

Okay, so I just tried uploading the photo to this blog and no matter where I live, I am still not savvy in computer technology. SO, no picture. Sorry.

Either way, my sister-in-law is coming in town this weekend (we are currently staying in her house) and we are going to stay to be with her and then on Monday.... officially start sleeping there.

Today has been good. I am studying idolatry in my life. While thinking about moving, I am trying to daily and momently give to the Lord the desire to have..... to have a couch.... to have a home.... to have a something cute and quaint.... None of these things are bad and I realize that... but what is ironic is sometimes when you don't have, you can idolize... and want.... and think it is "right" for you to have and want.

Ughhh.... anyway, so while transition can be hard, it forces the moment by moment need for Christ and also the awareness that in Him I am sufficient and all my needs are met.

Okay, on another side note... wow, I become really random without focus, huh?

My kids have been doing Bible with me over the last few weeks and I just gave them a test over Titus. They can, if asked, tell me the two major themes of this book of the Bible and tell me the difference between rebellious men and overseers and elders. It has been fascinating to me to see their ability to pick things up so quickly....

Have a great day.

Here is the deal!

2011-05-24T07:49:00.000-07:00

Okay, so here is the deal. I am finding it really hard to justify this blog with pictures of the kids and I doing different things here in the USA.... you know what I mean? Not quite so impactful I would imagine for the most of you....

SO, I was considering stopping, but I do want to share some of our transition thoughts, but maybe in the midst of what I am learning through Gospel Transformation. What do you think?

Knowing that, I would imagine that some of you might find this your last time visiting "John and Corrie Guckenberger Family" blogsite. I understand and would maybe do the same if I were you.

BUT, if some of you are interested still, just know that I am going to be trying to blog around three times a week about "Gospel Transformation" and the impact the bible study has had on me. At the same time I will be sprinkling bits and pieces of our family, our future and where God is leading.

Enjoy!

First, just know that this week I am all about learning "idolatry" and the many faces it wears in my life. It is not a pretty picture. More to come. Have a great day!

hey there to the perfect world

2011-05-18T13:08:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone,

Here are just some random photos of my family. We went 4 wheeling while in NC and I have decided that I enjoy most being outside: hiking, picnicing, smelling the flowers and just feeling the breeze. It has been gross here and so I am missing the outdoors, but I know it won't be much longer.

In my fairy tale world of perfectness (meaning money isn't an issue and neither are my character flaws) I would like to live in a home in the middle of tons of land and then I would make my own garden and work the land. Yes, in this world, I don't get tired of picking weeds. In this world, we have the funds to buy a 4 wheeler and own about 30 acres.

Do you ever find your thoughts going to your world of perfectness? Because people would come to this property and feel loved and welcomed and eventually know Christ (if they didn't already) in a real way. It would be people's moment of peace before they enter their life again.

Oh well. have a great day. Enjoy the day we do have, perfect or not.

orphan care stateside

2011-05-12T08:16:00.000-07:00

Well, we have slowly begun to find a new rhythm for our family. John is in the office, I am taking the mornings to homeschool the kids, we are reconnecting gradually with friends and family and we are clothed and fed each day. Who could ask for more, correct?

It has been a strange realization for John and I how different it is to be working indirectly with orphan care verses "hands on" directly with these children. It isn't bad, just different. With John being in the office, I can tend to feel a bit removed. We have spent our last six years working together in another country, learning to communicate in a way that shows us as partners in our day in and day out routine. We are having to readjust our talk, reevaluate what our time is spent on and recognize the need for other time commitments during this season.

John is in the office doing behind the scenes work: helping the missionaries on the field by answering questions that come in (insurance, grant policies, etc...) by them, helping move the new office quarters and working on donor relations. Basically, whatever needs come in that he can actually do (the office environment takes a little bit different skill set than his usual building). It is good to see how hard the office works for these children/teens that are pictured. I believe it is actually harder to be here than there. While on the field you are reminded daily that these orphans are real and in real struggle. Here, you are motivated by God's heart for the Fatherless and the knowledge that everyone has their part...and every part is vital to the meeting of the need.

We are grateful to see a more "full" picture of the workings of Back 2 Back and once again feel grateful to be partnered with these individuals who toil just as much as the "on field" staff and yet don't get the immediate realization that a need is being met. They are soldiers in a bigger picture and these children are loved dearly by the Lord no matter where any of us live.

new bible study

2011-05-06T12:38:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I know it has been really long since my last post. We are currently working with no internet in the home and so John has been taking the computer in the morning to download our emails and then brings them home to me..... which doesn't leave much time to blog....

We are hoping that will changed real soon.

First things first,

HAPPY MOTHER's DAY!!!

I pray all you mother's out there will feel celebrated and enjoyed.

Second, I don't do this very often, but this time, I just had to:

I am doing this bible study called "Gospel Transformation" and I just wanted to give it a little shout out as it is amazing! It is a 9 month study (so no joking around) all about the gospel transforming every detail of your life. FROM WEEK ONE, I was hooked and usually it takes a few days/weeks for me to get involved excitedly in a study.

I am gathering so far that it will bring you to be VERY aware of your own sin (maybe half of the book which will be about 4 or 5 months of "bummer, I am a serious sinner") to then lead you to all truths that are from the Gospel.... I could really go on and on about things I am learning so far, but for those of you looking for something -- HERE YOU GO!!

If you are looking for a bible study that you can do at your own pace, I highly recommend this one. It is put out by World Harvest Mission.

No pictures, just encouragement....

changing perspective

2011-04-30T05:48:00.000-07:00

I am beginning on Monday to finish with the kids school year in our Cincinnati home. I was starting to notice that Sami was pronouncing her “H’s” like “Haychis” (phonetically, of course) because of living in Jos. Cute, but I am excited for her to pronounce them the way I was raised to pronounce them. That is a minor example of what we are constantly working through raising them to be "third culture kids".

We JUST don’t like change, do we? (I am sure by now, you all are tired of me talking about transition… I cannot help it, it is the reality of where I am… and what if we stay this way FOREVER!!! Okay, I am getting ahead of myself… Where was I?) We tend to resist anything that pushes, prods or pulls us from a place of the comfortable recognized to the uncomfortable unknown. My mind was drawn to the present struggles of our present state of transition. We are used to being the foreigners (that is the majority of my kids life), not the stay at home Americans.

One of the reasons this transition has been more challenging is that we are being allowed to stay in friend’s home’s for a bit… someone else’s home, someone else’s furniture, someone else’s circle of life. I’m not trying to complain, for we are so thankful for both of these provisions, yet this is our reality. So it feels like home, but it isn’t quite… Without a doubt, it is emotionally harder to move back and forth with secondary school children ~ tweens. They’d just found where they belonged and we uproot them to return to a place that isn’t what they left before. So, they are back to figuring out where they belong once again when they’d anticipated coming "home." But people leave; others grow, looking and sounding different; still others change and have new priorities or a different direction – nothing remains static and so it just isn’t the same.

As I’ve pondered and prayed – then realized that I should first pray and then ponder: How are we to shepherd our children through this time, the Holy Spirit brought my thoughts to perhaps the most well known words in the Bible about what it looks like to be a good shepherd.

The LORD is my shepherd;

I have all that I need.

Psalm 23:1 (NLT)

When God blessed us with children, He gave us the privilege of becoming shepherds… one more way we can learn to imitate our God and our Savior. So I read these words, words first stamped onto my heart over 20 years ago, gentle words reminding me how the Good Shepherd cares for me and see a very practical example of how I can shepherd my children.

I came across another blog site that helped me put some of my “overwhelmed thoughts” into more practical steps to consider:

“· I can let them rest, making sure our home is a place of security, fun and respite from the stresses in their worlds all around them.

· I can lead – with my words, my actions, my attitudes, my life. Do I approach the challenges with a gentle spirit, accepting and welcoming God’s sovereignty and excited to see what He will do because I know He will work?

· I can renew: revamping harried schedules, repairing wrong attitudes and beliefs, restoring tired hearts, making good on promises and things I’ve said, renovating to salvage the bad and hard days.

· I can guide, showing them again and again that we run to Jesus with our celebrations, challenges and sorrows.

· I can protect through disciplining, both myself and my children as necessary.

· I can comfort, often just by caring about the hard, seemingly little things.

· I can prepare a feast… healthy, nutritious snacks and meals that I know will delight my family… and that time of preparation is a wonderful time to pray for them… or to encourage them to work alongside me and share about/pray through their days.

· I can honor them: respecting their feelings, attitudes and perceptions even when they need repair, admiring their accomplishments and the person God is growing them to be, giving credit where credit is due, protecting their reputations, remembering that they, too, are heirs of the King.

· I can pursue them with goodness and unfailing love, whose source is, of course, the Good Shepherd.”

Good stuff, huh? Sounds easy, right? Hah, I think that is why I like that first verse of Psalm 23. “The Lord is my shepherd, I have all that I need.”

I guess that is my take home. I might mess up and not do what I should be doing to care for them, but I can come back to the idea that Jesus is all that I need. I can trust that in following the example of my Shepherd, He will open the eyes of my children so that they see their cup, too, overflowing with blessings from heaven.

I know this one was long! Thanks for staying with me.

a new transition

2011-04-28T05:30:00.001-07:00

Isn't this sunrise beautiful? It probably doesn't mean the same to you as it does to my family. It is the idea of just being there to experience it that makes it wonderful. But, you have to admit, it still is pretty.

This photo represents to me a new day, a new start, a new transition. We are officially in OH. We have gone from Nigeria, England, USA - FL, NC, OH within 3 1/2 weeks. It has felt a bit overwhelming to be living out of a suitcase for this long, but every stop along our trail home has been so worth it. No regrets!

So, starting sometime real soon, we will start emailing again, making phone calls again and all the other regular daily activities that make life feel normal. The kids are doing great. Yesterday they went to the grocery store with me and we were all so surprised to hear the "storm" coming out of the vegetable department and then after hearing the thunder, watching it rain on the vegetables. It amazes me what things are out there.

Anyway, I am not real sure what this new transition holds for us as a family, but I would sincerely love your prayers to join ours with where or what God might be leading us. We want to climb the mountain He wants us to climb - not the one that we think might be the best. We need your prayers. If I were to be honest, I am a bit scared. Is that allowed to be written on a blog? Not sure, if not, oops, too personal. Thanks.

Either way, it is a new transition and with that comes a new understanding and a new growth. We will start our climb today, Lord willing. :)

Happy Easter

2011-04-24T18:35:00.000-07:00

It has been so long since we have communicated anything. Life has been full.

We have been receiving lots of emails with questions regarding where we are, etc...

We are in NC, after visiting John's mom in FL, after having a family vacation in FL. It has been nice seeing some grandparents.... but sad enough our stay in NC is not long enough to do all that we would want. SO, we will return another time to visit more and get some things done.

We leave this week to go back to OH to get a little unpacking done before John's starts work in the home office. I have to admit, it has been hard to adjust to everything, but I know that God will work through each of us to draw each one of us to Himself more and more with each day.

We are looking forward to seeing each one of you and catching up. Please continue to pray for us and I will become more regular with blogging once we are home and in somewhat of our daily life routine.... (I forget what that looks like).

Have a great Easter! He is risen indeed (for all of us Methodists out there) :)

how we speak, baby steps

2011-04-14T06:12:00.000-07:00

Well, we are in FL enjoying the sun and the activities that are just a click away.

Everything from Putt-Putt, go karting, walks on the beach, playing volleyball in the pool and of course you have all the restaurants meeting whatever food desire you happen to be craving in the moment. So much to do, to eat, to partake in.....

YET, surprisingly enough, we can still experience children dealing with Boredom.... what do you really think that means anyway? I will look it up.... I will be back in a moment.

adjectivefeeling weary because one is unoccupied or lacks interest in one's current activity
Can this be the real definition? Hopefully, you all are seeing that I am not really questioning the definition as much as the use of it from kids mouths. Okay, look, now I am trying to be vague, as in ALL KIDS SAY THIS, when in reality I am trying to not hone in on the condition of my own children. UGH.... Maybe there are too many options offered. My sister-in-law, Beth, and I were talking about how she read an article that if you offer up two choices to someone you are bound to see more productivity than if you were to give them an unlimited amount of choices. Interesting, isn't it?
We are trained and think it is our right to have an unlimited amount of choices, as if this makes us more powerful to choose "Yes, I will go go karting today" when there are 100 things to do. Verses, "I guess I will go go karting since there is only one other option...." That doesn't even make sense in the practicality of it, but yet, here John and I are thinking and leading our kids to believe that if we offer them 100 choices while at the beach in FL, we are allowing them to feel that this vacation is SOOOO FUNNNNN. We are starting them off on the wrong foot.
Truth is, "kids this is such a treat and we are so blessed, let's enjoy the water and the sun and the gifts around us because we can now say with firsthand experience that there are kids in Africa right now, plowing a field or taking care of children that are not theirs to take care of...."
Wow, little soap box there, sorry. All in all, we are having a great time as a family and I am grateful for the gifts before us. As a matter of fact, we are off to see the tallest lighthouse in FL and the largest lighthouse museum in the USA. Hmmmm, interesting after all that I wrote.... I guess it is baby steps :)
Even though we are here, the last two pictures represent where my heart and mind keep wandering to when there is a moment to sit and think. Our Jos village and our Jos family. Keep praying for them as the elections are continuing this weekend, prayerfully with no crisis.

transitions

2011-04-07T02:23:00.000-07:00

We have arrived safely in Cincinnati, OH. Leave tomorrow for our FL vacation and traveling time. BUT, it has been so refreshing to be home with Todd and Beth's family for the last couple of days. The kids are playing and we are getting a few things done...

Here are a couple of photos of our kids while in London. We were able to have almost a full day layover there. The kids were excited about the double decker buses and were completely amazed with the driving being done on the opposite side of the road. John and I were amazed how we have been foreigners so long now and yet can still be caught off guard with how to find places in another country. I am guessing that maybe we have become too accustomed to third world cultures that a first world landscape was a challenge... who knows, but it was nice being there, once we figured out our transportation issues.

Just a couple of comments that John and I have heard from our kids (we can only remember these, but I tell you, there have been some funny things we have laughed to ourselves about in regards to our kids transition):

"Look at these pretty lillies, they are everywhere!" - while looking at dandelions in a field.

"Why is the car stopping for us, that is weird." - while crossing a street in London and the cars actually stopped to let us pass.

"Why are there wrappers around each of these straws?" - when picking up a straw for a POP at McDonald's

"This is the best place ever." - coming from John as we entered a Skyline Chili and the first thing he sees is they have placed a HUGE bottle of hand sanitizer on the ledge for people to use as they walk in.....

Again, so many more "WOW" moments, but no memory to record them. We are glad we are home, but I am learning that once again, we find ourselves in transition mode. Maybe the Lord doesn't want us (me) to find security in a location or in a routine, knowing it would take my eyes off of him and onto the location and/or routine. I am not sure, but either way, we are in transition again and will be for the next month, so we continue to grab each moment and make the most of it.

goodbye

2011-03-30T23:35:00.000-07:00

Well, this is it! Our final day in Jos, Nigeria Africa! This is the reason for the new look. What do you think? I don't know, I am not settled with it yet, so we will see. The photo below is of most of our furniture being delivered to another ministry. I am sad.

I have had a few people ask me to keep blogging even when we return to the United States, to be able to keep up with our repatriation. So, I will do that. It will be harder to share struggles when most of you reading this will be "next door" but I think it will be healthy for me to have an outlet and maybe some people reading this from other countries will catch a glimpse of one family's transition back to american living and the effects of being a third culture kid even in the States.

Just for information, we leave from Jos to go to Abuja tomorrow morning. We stay there for just a few days while waiting out the election and then travel to London. We will be there for about a day and then head to Chicago then Cincinnati. We arrive in Cincinnati for just a couple of days to head to FL for a bit of a vacation, then visit some family off and on as we head back up north to OH. John starts working beginning of May in our home office and then we will see what happens.

I don't know the consistency of internet for the next month, but we will start our new blog with it's new purpose within this time. Thank you, all of you out there, for your encouragement and support.

Here is the latest Guckenberger family photo. The new Guckenberger's, the ones who have lived in Africa for a couple of years and therefore, are different. Praise God for the ability to live an adventure that He has called us to. It is for Him and through Him we do what we do!

24, diet coke and friends

2011-03-30T12:35:00.000-07:00

I really cannot add to the title for this photo. Except in the midst of teams, drop ins, guests visiting and packing up our life....it has been a small but rejuvenating pleasure to end some of our days watching 24 with some good friends while drinking diet coke.

drop ins

2011-03-29T12:03:00.000-07:00

It is customary when someone is moving away to drop in to say your goodbyes. Our last few days has been just that. Lots of nigerians making their way to our front gate to communicate friendship and safe journeys. There are stories with each one of these pictures, but for the sake of time, just know that these friends that are photographed here (and more that we didn't think to get their picture) are our friends and we are thankful!

last ola

2011-03-28T22:57:00.000-07:00

We went yesterday to say goodbye to the children of OLA. Kenny is gone now (his mom returned after finishing school), living in Lagos. And there is a new boy Benjamin.... constant change. And I think our camera is dying....

Needless to say, I was sad.

no regrets

2011-03-27T00:16:00.000-07:00

John and I had a conversation with our kids a few weeks ago talking about leaving with no regrets. We all talked about what it might mean to leave Jos with no regrets. Of course, it was and is different for all of us.

For me, it is definitely about relationships. So, the Lord has really allowed me to have moments to say goodbye in ways that are real and tangible to my heart. I am so grateful. Here are just a few snaps to reflect some of our goodbyes and some of our heartfelt relationships.

The top picture is of John trying to tease the camel for the food he had. (Yes, I do believe John would have won if the camel hadn't booted him out of the space). We had the joy of having three girls over that we just love. The Payne's (they have been in our blog a few times) have been such an answered prayer to our family and their children have been so much fun to have stay with us. We took them to our local zoo, the next photo is of all of the children together by the gorilla cage.

The hiking rocks that are on our property are also a favorite, so we packed a lunch one day and had another family join us and we hiked up to the top and enjoyed a lunch, but mostly enjoyed friendships and conversation and landscape of the village. Unbeatable!

On our way home, I wanted to say goodbye to my good friend, Sasa. She runs the widow's ministry that we take our groups to called Gidan Bege. But, to my surprise, when we got there, she had all the ladies singing an african song communicating thanks. They were clapping and welcoming me into their shop one last time. They had also made me a skirt (note the yellow skirt in the photo) and a purse. To say that I was touched and speechless was an understatement. The last photo is me in the midst of all the african prints and colors that I will miss when I return to the monochromatic USA.

Here is the thing. I realize that most people aren't interested in my last days in Jos, Nigeria. BUT, it is part of my process. I recall the first days learning about the christian/muslim differences and now I don't process that anymore. My end days (which by the way is less than a week) are not of the intrigues of a new and foreign land, but they are of the deep felt gaps that might be evident if not closed well and sincerely. They are of people who have changed me and I want to say thanks. I will be forever different because of them. This land is no longer foreign and it is no longer full of intrigue. It is a home that I am having to say goodbye to and will forever miss. I appreciate all of you giving me the space to process. I will leave Jos and I will leave with no regrets, the Lord willing anyway :).

a full day

2011-03-25T17:54:00.001-07:00

The team has come and gone and we couldn't have ended better.

I had the privilege to be on the last complete day. It was a full one. We started with visiting a future bridal shop, then we went to a prayer dedication service for the aquaponics test model that I was telling you about earlier. I was not into the details of this project, but I was really impressed with the outcome.

Literally, as they were pouring the fish into the small pond they had set up, they explained the process of how these two systems will feed itself and produce healthier vegetation and fish. These pictures hopefully can explain better what I cannot.

After this time of dedication, we went souvenir shopping, came home for lunch and then ended with a birthday party for the children of OLA. I loved it! Thanks to a friend from an earlier team, we were even able to attain a jumpy castle and they kids couldn't have been more thrilled. Thanks Bobby!

I couldn't have been more excited to be a part of this team and this day. To see these men spend time with these particular Fatherless brought tears to my eyes. Each person was assigned a child. They made sure "in the moment" they were their complete focus. So, as the kids opened up their birthday gift, they immediately had someone to play with or be excited for them. What a joy!

P.S. On a little side note, Kenny from OLA (Do you remember him? - about two years old?) was finally reunited with his mother who has been in Lagos completing her education. He left the orphanage on Saturday last week. As much as I was heartbroken to not have said goodbye, I was thankful that his mother, even if she could not visit over the last two years, truly did return for him when she was able to care for him in a way she desired. Praise God!

one last celebration

2011-03-23T22:43:00.000-07:00

With the team being here this week, we once again hosted a celebration night with them. It was fun as Emilee changed it up a bit with having it at a local hotel/restaurant. This is the whole group (minus our children, not sure where they went).

A festive bunch, eh?

Today I am with them all day long as we will be souvenir shopping and having a birthday party for the children of OLA. It will be so fun to get these business men to an orphanage. What a gift it will be.

Have a great day.

a prayer to become fat

2011-03-21T23:51:00.000-07:00

Evangelical Church West Africa, Kissayhip B village church. This has been our home church for the past two years. It hasn't always been the deepest sermons and it hasn't always been the most comfortable, but it has always been the most joyful, alive worship experience that I, Corrie, have ever (in my entire life) experienced.

We, for the last time, brought our team there this past Sunday and listened and fellowshipped with these humble people. The way they worship the Lord through song has changed me forever. Tears strolled down my face as the fellowship women sang about Shadrach, Meshach, Abednego and Daniel and how they refused the king's food, but committed to the Lord to eat His food and the others watched them become "fat". While they were singing, they were also dancing their way around the church to the front pulpit offering to the Lord the vegetables of their land.

I sit here writing this wondering how will I return to the churches of my home? I, once again, feel as if I am going to have to go through another culture shock. BUT, I do know of the Lord's faithfulness. He has shown my whole family over and over again that He has much more to do with us, He has much more to teach us and He has many more ways to draw me to Himself. I guess I will have to take what I have learned from this church and move forward with the Lord's leading.

And who knows, maybe I will become "fat" in the process.

beginning of the lasts & another random ending

2011-03-19T22:51:00.000-07:00

Does it feel like I have been saying that for awhile now? Sorry.

BUT, the truth is the three ladies in that first photo were at the last track meet, so I won't be at Hillcrest anymore. My kids had their last day of school, I had my last track meet and Sarah had her last sleepover with her friends.

When her friends said goodbye to her, I overheard a Psalm prayer blessing being recited to her and then they prayed over her. Gosh, I tell you what.... it is in these moments that I praise God for the surrounding of good girls who love my daughter and love the Lord!

We have our last team here (they arrived yesterday) and our furniture is slowly being removed from the house.

So, with all of that being said, I wanted to bring up my younger sister, Jodi, to everyone in my blog world. She is my favorite of my sisters (sorry Kelley, she made me say this, but we know the truth :))! She has helped John and I for the last six years being on the mission field. She has taken care of so much on the home end and we are so grateful for her willingness to be a part of the bigger picture of John and Corrie Guckenberger. Without her, our ability to stay focused would be strained as we would be dealing with details of home.

Not sure why I wanted to bring her up except maybe I just felt led! I love you Jodi!

She is going to be mad that I used this photo because it is over a year old and she was pregnant here... hee hee....

SSE & the team

2011-03-17T23:17:00.000-07:00

Yesterday as my mom and I were planning for our day with the team, we stopped in the new chicken coop and the beginning stages of the aquaponics test model.

SSE is our ministry that we partner with here in Jos. It stands for Self Sustaining Enterprises. They do an excellent job creating positions for those in the village that will actually benefit the village in the long run. The top two photos are of the new chicken coop (located in the same vicinity of the education center). Solomon is the main care giver for these chickens. He does so well.

The last two photos are of the test model of the aquaponics system. The team that is arriving today will be putting this together and they have actually done the research and another test model in Cincinnati.

This is a fish pond and a vegetation garden. The idea of this is that the one will feed the other which will create better nutrients for both. Pray for the set up here because our materials are different. We are grateful for the team arriving today because they have done the legwork and the trials and they are bringing some materials to help us be successful as much as we can on our end. If this achieves the goals we think it can, it will be such a blessing for this village on a larger scale. The fencing that you see around the pond is our version of fencing to keep the monkeys out of it. We hope anyway! We are really thankful for SSE and this team because their efforts benefit the village,

which in turn, benefits the orphans living in this village.

And all glory is the Lords!

family dinner

2011-03-15T22:35:00.000-07:00

Last night, we had our staff over for dinner. It felt like family to us. Let's just recap some of the traits of our staff that we have had the chance to work with:

passionate, Peter-like, strength of conviction and character, unconditional, faithful, discerning, alive, part to whole, including of others, intentional, loving and respectful, willing to go against the flow. BUT, even though all of these traits are a gift, I think most of all, they love the Lord and desire His will above their own.

goodbyes

2011-03-14T23:38:00.000-07:00

On Sunday evening, some of our closer, missionary friends here in Jos got together and had a fellowship dinner for us. I am getting worse at actually getting some good photos as I am trying to be "all present" with these things.

It was a blessing as well as a challenge to try to communicate what these past two years have meant to John and I and our family with each one of them. We truly have been gifted these friendships that we don't deserve, but we need desperately. Each of these families represent some aspect of who John and I are and who we have become due to their impact.

I actually am getting choked up thinking about it. Needless to say, goodbye's don't get easier. We are grateful for the ways the Lord has decided to extend His favor to our family and pray that we have been half of the blessing that others have been to us.

P.S. On a side note, yesterday was my last track practice and they had a huge card and photo and everyone wrote something very kind in it, ready to give me at the end of the practice. I was very touched by each of the students as they took the time to encourage me. Again, humbled by the Lord's grace and mercy towards me.

i love these kids

2011-03-14T03:58:00.000-07:00

I don't have much to say except that I just returned from a morning at OLA and I love these children. I love them.

life

2011-03-12T22:12:00.001-08:00

There are some weeks that life here just seems like normal life anywhere: how you spend your time, being a mother and friend, etc...

Lately, that is what has been going on. Even though we are getting ready to move, we are still prepping for a team, going to birthday parties, helping people move and taking one day at a time.

Here are just a couple snaps of the last week (except one): top photo is of this year's track team, well half of it anyway. The Seniors were gone and some other class meetings were happening, but these students have been filling my Monday, Wednesday and Friday afternoons.

Then, we watched Peyton yesterday morning while our friends and directors moved from the ministry house to finally, their own place. Okay, so it is still on the same compound, but at least what they use is theirs. She is super cute and we always enjoy getting some time with her (especially Sarah knowing we are leaving).

The last picture is of baby Daniel and myself about 9 months ago. Truth is, he celebrated his one year birthday party yesterday and bummer, I forgot my camera. BUT, you have to believe me when I tell you that he is precious to me and I will be praying for him for years to come. Anyway, that is it for now. Nothing major, but life, still taking place in Jos.

vow of community

2011-03-09T10:08:00.000-08:00

Last week I had the opportunity to help one of the sisters at OLA get to town.

It was the one I knew the least and she was going to have to take a taxi. Her name is Sister Filemon. It had been a hard day for me up to that point. No real reason, I was just feeling down and a bit left out. It was exactly what God had prescribed for me.

The sister and I were talking about how living in community can be hard, but is well worth the practice of it. When they "sign up" or feel the call of being an actual sister, they must make three vows: the vow of poverty, the vow of chastity and the vow of obedience. She then made an interesting comment about how she wishes they would add a third vow to their ceremony - the vow of

community. Her thought was this is where all three come together.

My whole point of mentioning this is because as I once again took the 8th grade girls (remember love in high action) to visit the OLA children, I saw a change in the atmosphere. The first time I took them, it was a bit awkward. They were 7th graders, first time doing anything like this and they enjoyed the children. Then again in October, the second time, they felt more comfortable so they loved and played hard, all good stuff. Then this last time I realized that there was more of a depth of affection and more of a desire to be apart of these children. This time these girls went and we swept the entire orphanage, not just swept, but really got under things swept and organized, and they loved on the kids. I even found out that one of them had taken her family over Christmas to spend time with them.

I kept saying, "this was great, this is the best time ever," but I couldn't put my finger on the exact reason why. Then as I looked around, big picture, I realized these girls had formed a community with these children. It was no longer their community serving the other community, but it had become one community serving each other out of the affection of Christ. It was an overflow of what was already established. Gosh, what an amazing thing to be a part of, and I am so grateful for the community here that has allowed us to serve alongside of them as it is a vow that is taken seriously in each of our hearts.

billards, anyone?

2011-03-08T21:46:00.001-08:00

I maybe have shown you a similar photo before, I just cannot remember. But, I took this yesterday on the way home from OLA (more photos on that tomorrow) and again was struck by some of the things that shocked me when I first moved here - all the people not doing anything in the middle of the day, and you really do see these pool tables around with people playing them out in the open.

At night, the owner takes off the "lid" and puts it in his hut, along with the balls and sticks, to be returned the next morning. Kind of different, huh? Seeing pool halls taking place outside?

Anyway, I hope you can see it in the midst of everything else.

sami carnival moments

2011-03-06T08:21:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was Hillcrest's school carnival. They do one every spring to help the sophomore class raise funds for their senior trip. It was strange to think back two years prior and realize that the carnival was the first "Hillcrest" event we went to and it will also be our last official "Hillcrest" event we go attend.

Below is Sami trying out the zipline. After waiting an hour to have her turn, she gets to the top and realizes that she is actually scared and no longer wants to go down that way.... and of course, as any sophomore would communicate, according to Sami, "Mom, they said tough, this is the only way down. Get ready!" So, reluctantly she complied and down she went. In the end, she loved it and glad she participated.

Then Sarah, with her winning tickets bought red hair spray color dye. Sami was her second customer (really, my mom was her first customer with orange spray, but she wouldn't give us a photo... :)). Either way, she sure is cute, huh?

Carnival's are fun. I am glad we went.

old woman

2011-03-04T23:01:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was one of my longest days here, ever! Don't get me wrong, not hard, excruciating long :::: just packed a lot in one day hard! By the time the day was over, I felt that I was an old woman.

The day began with FIELD DAY!! Yes, after last years, yellow lightening bolts, I tackled the once again dubious title as field day leader. BUT, this year we were the yellow tazers! Yes, that is right, we will rock you, shock you, phase you, taze you. :)

It is amazing how easily we can forget how tiring certain things can be when they are done only once a year! But we had a lot of fun exhausting ourselves while participating in varying activities and encouraging not only our own teammates, but the other teams as well.

Straight from that was a goodbye party for myself and Sami hosted by the third grade moms. These moms have been such a connection for me the entire time living here in Jos. I am so grateful for them, their encouragement, advice and tons of laughter. I truly say with a pure heart that I love them. I have shared a big part of my life with them and will leave a more whole, complete person because of these ladies.

Now, wait, the day is not over. After sweating, burning, laughing, crying, sharing and other emotions and physical activities that took place all before three o'clock, I then quickly raced over to coach track practice. That lasted a couple of hours and then FINALLY was able to return home with Sami and a friend who was going to spend the night. Sarah had her own sleepover at a friend's house that I later found out was actually a surprise party for her that her 6th grade girls were hosting in her honor. I am praying she was nothing but blessed.

Either way, by the time I fell into bed I was realizing that I started the day as a 38 year old woman who went to bed feeling 70! All in a day's work, right, and all worth it!

african beauty

2011-03-03T21:44:00.000-08:00

African beauty, right?

like sand in the hourglass and living purposefully for the Lord.

2011-02-28T23:45:00.001-08:00

John and I are really going through everything in our home. Giving things away, throwing things out, selling a few items, but mostly just realizing how much we have and at the same time how much we don't have. The pictures to the right are of our little courtyard from when we first moved here and then again about a year into it and then the last three just yesterday.

Living purposefully for the Lord.

Time shows itself so evidently when faced with a photograph, doesn't it? And yet when sitting here typing this, I cannot believe we have about one month left, where did the time go? We are simultaneously preparing for a group, packing up our home, being purposeful with relationships to say goodbye, and transferring anything we "take care" of to others within the ministry.

Living purposefully for the Lord.

It is funny, I remember a soap opera when I was real young that started off with this saying, "Like sands in the hourglass, so are the days of our lives....." (Come on, admit it, you remember and you watched.....:)) Even though I did not watch this show, I cannot walk into my home here and not hear this phrase being repeated over and over again. We are leaving once again with less than we came. AND yet, honestly, it feels different this time. Really different.

Living purposefully for the Lord.

I am more scared this time around. Not sure why, but with each goodbye, something grabs my throat a bit. With each item not going back with us, I realize how much we don't have, tangibly as a family. Yet at the same time everything we are giving away, I realize how we have too much and why do we "store things" in case we need them later? People, places and things....... relationships, schools, and household goods.....

Yet, this phrase keeps entering my mind...

Living purposefully for the Lord.

I am praying each one of these friendships, each one of these relationships that the Lord has allowed us to cross paths with, even in Jos Nigeria, Africa have been by the Lord's doing and His alone. That living purposefully for Him means life is sometimes uncertain and scary and not sure where your next step is going or will be BUT, it is also full, purposeful and adventurous.

Lord, please I pray, give us the strength and the confidence to go home with no regrets and to continue living purposefully for you.

the business of animals

2011-02-27T22:04:00.000-08:00

Do you remember Sister Fidelia and her fish farm with OLA? Well, B2B (along with other people and ministries) has continued to help her finish the back area for a full fledge animal selling business.

To the right are the photos of the different animals you can purchase: goats, cattle, chicken, and still fish. When the kids and I walked back there, I was shocked with how complete it looked. What I love the most is that sister Fidelia has assured us that any profit that comes from these animals goes directly to the orphanage. Anybody want some animals?

Baby Lucky started getting heavy for my two youngest so they transported him in my bag.... I know, poor Lucky, right? I promise you he was loved on the whole time!

My children also brought their kites to let the kids have them. It was a blast seeing the older children try to figure out this paper air thing. It was the perfect windy day, if only we could remove the trees and the power lines they would get caught on. Oh well, I guess you do what you can with what you have!

exactly what was hoped and planned for

2011-02-25T02:43:00.000-08:00

Many of you seen my blog and therefore have seen posts regarding the new education center in the village we minister alongside.

I wanted to give you an update to show you that this part of ministry is really going the "way you think it should." Most people understand that what you want to happen and what you plan to happen don't always happen, especially when you are working with individuals. I know that I am not the teacher of this precious school but it is exactly what we had hoped and planned for - orphaned children receiving an opportunity to further their education development.

The above picture is the six children in Theresa and Esther's first class (the two teachers, Theresa is pictured to the left). They are receiving their snack to begin their day. Theresa noticed early on some lack of attention and after further inquiries she realized, and learned that the students were hungry and not getting fed. She instituted a healthy and filling snack to begin the day and it has worked.

This last photo is of the first class waiting in line to use the restroom. To my understanding this has been a fun educational exercise as well, showing the village kids how to properly use a toilet. This first class is followed by another class with four students. It is nice to be apart of something and see it move forward in the way you pictured it in your mind. And by "be apart" of this, I definitely am not teaching and I didn't build the structure nor add finances to help this along, but I did pray and encourage and invest in my own way; therefore, I am apart of it and so are many of you. Thank you for your own investment in this whole process and for adopting the moments in front of you.

container fruit!

2011-02-24T01:31:00.001-08:00

Good morning! Yesterday, as a staff, we all went to the Oasis Community Center (located in the village) with the intent to organize all the donations and items that came in with the container that SSE brought to us from the United States. I tell you what.... what a full day! It was amazing as we all realized what gifts had been given and the fruit of people's hearts overflowing with what they have to give to people who have not. It was a day full of blessing and good old fashioned hard work. When you receive much, there is much to be responsible for, and I believe as a staff team, we are up to the task. We are growing daily in our overwhelmingness with God's goodness.

The photo above is how my day started. I dropped the kids off at school and went directly to the village. Since I was able to be there earlier I had a wonderful time meeting with the Lord. And, of course, I love being out in nature, especially the nature I can view from the village rocks.

Then as the day progressed, we had lots of people willing to help sort, organize, clean and even start the process of giving away to those who live here (nigerians) who are themselves in need. I really had no idea how much it would entail to truly organize so much clothing! We were even willing to take anyone to help.... even little Daniel was put in a bin and helped organize shoes.... :) Yes, he is so stinking cute!

As we stopped for a great fellowship lunch, it was fun to see how the donations given and the timing of the container and the timing of all of us being able to stop our usual routine and schedule to come together to sort was God's timing due to the fact that as we are going through, one of our staff men, came to us with a need of a friend of the ministry (Beatrice, who helped with the block machine), his home had partially burned down and his two boys were in great need. Within five minutes, we had a whole suitcase full of items that were appropriate for them. I loved the idea of meeting such a need immediately.

In the end, we had lots packed up and ready to go to their appropriate places and things were organized and easily accessible to those who will need it in the future. What fruit!

child labor laws

2011-02-21T21:51:00.001-08:00

If you thought this blog was going to be about me speaking out against child labor in Jos. Sorry to disappoint!

This is actually just going to be about all the things my kids have learned to do while living here. We were joking this weekend with the idea of "everything they have to do". I asked if they felt cheated in their childhood, and yet again, they know no different, so it is good, right?

Okay, in all seriousness, I am not for children working in unhealthy conditions for too many hours instead of being educated.... :) (Just in case there were any real concerns).

BUT, I really do enjoy all the things my children have learned to do and are now apart of their regular schedule. They don't even flinch when asked to the laundry, or hang it up to dry on the line. They are also great at washing dishes, putting them away, cooking and filling our ice trays.... (that last one is kind of a joke, because we don't get power enough to even have ice.... but it is really cold water with a hard film on top :)).

I asked my kids what their favorite chores are to do. Here were their responses:

Sarah - cooking

Gus - unloading the dishes from the drying rack

Sami - cooking or helping me cook

It appears that when we move back to the States, I won't need to

cook or do the dishes. I guess that leaves me laundry, huh? Oh well, I guess I can do something to help out!

I hope you enjoy your chores today!!

leaving well

2011-02-19T23:00:00.001-08:00

Good morning (THIS IS JOHN)

I know you all enjoy Cor's blogs, but I wanted to jump in and give a small update.

Most of you know we are leaving Nigeria soon. We plan to start our home assignment on May 2nd in Cincinnati. We ask for your prayers as we prepare to leave Nigeria. It is one thing to move our things, but another to say good bye and leave well. We have developed a lot of great friendships here (as well, our children have also) so it will be a difficult process. One thing that I have learned from my wife is that she "pre-processes" things. Meaning she really focuses on going through the process of leaving before leaving or finishing something. So when she says goodbye, it is without regrets. We really want to take the time to say good bye well to friends, co-workers, and ministry sites. We are grateful for the time here.

As we transition to the US, we are looking forward to debriefing and working through what God has for us next. In the past, I have always felt an urgency to move quickly to the next thing where God wants as if I might miss the opportunity, but Im learning that I have often put my timing on His plans. We are prayerful and are trusting God's leading and timing for what he has next. We lean heavy on your prayers so please don't stop. We know that we are in this together even if we are miles a part. Thanks for your faithfulness.

The photos are from a hike I went on this past week with Jason, Will and Israel (remember Israel is a director of a children's home we call RCH). Israel is a great guy and easy to connect with. We hiked about 9miles. It was great to be out in the bush with men I respect and enjoy. I kept looking for cobras, but didn't get to see one.

I have determined that if I am going to die in Africa, the best way would be by Cobra. I guess God didn't agree. :)

a sweet time

2011-02-18T22:06:00.001-08:00

I am not sure of what the weather is looking like where you live, but it is beautiful here. So beautiful, in fact, that I would say that it is extremely hot!

Yesterday afternoon, some of us ladies got together for just an afternoon of fellowship. It was truly a sweet time.

a safe haven

2011-02-17T22:19:00.001-08:00

I love how much OLA has become a safe haven for so many orphaned or abused children. Do you remember baby Ibocuku? A family came to take care of her last week. They felt where they lived was safe again.

A couple of days ago, I met James. He is a little over one they are guessing. Pray for him as he will be here for awhile we are guessing. When I fed him a muffin it was the first time he had eaten since being dropped off. By the time we left, he was mumbling a bit. He is cute and has very tiny features.

I wonder what his eyes are saying? I pray he comes to learn of OLA as a safe haven as well.

some old "ruts"

2011-02-16T22:36:00.000-08:00

I am learning and realizing that it sometimes takes so much to change a way of thinking or a pattern of living. We all get in our own "ruts" and stay there because frankly, it can feel so tiring to get out of it. Now, even though I know this really is true for all of us, I am just going to be talking about me. I mean, who really likes to be told how they are, right?? I don't! So, for the sake of having everyone read to the end, I get in "ruts" and I find it hard to choose to use my energy to try to get out of those ruts.

Yesterday, some of the women staff went over to OLA to train the caregivers how to properly use and handle some new cloth diapers that were donated. They use cloth diapers now, but they are just rags tied together. Our hope and prayer is that they will learn how to use these, knowing in the end, it will help them with less laundry, healthier alternative for the child and some further education on caring for babies and children.

BUT, we know they have done things a certain way for years now (including for their own children) and to "upset" the current system for a new system is extremely hard to do. To create new ruts is not easy, nor fun. I, being on the outside of their "rut", see it as such an obvious choice. All I see are the benefits. But, isn't that the easy side of things. The side that just says, "make a new rut!", "it will be so much easier if you do it this way!".... The luxury of being on this side, right?!

The Lord is showing me some of my own "ruts" and knowing some people in my life have seen these ruts for awhile now and have been probably yelling in their hearts, "make a new rut!", "it will be so much easier if you do it this way!", etc... but with my own life, I don't have the luxury of being on that side, I am on the side of "Please don't make me choose something different.", "I am so tired. I will try to change next week/month/year." Not as much fun, huh?

Anyway, so as I look at these women who are true definitions of a servant in my mind, and we show them truly a "better way" I have deep compassion for where they are and know that this change might not be viewed as the best thing ever, at least not at this exact moment. BUT, I do desire to slowly encourage and help them find a new "rut" and I want to be willing to do my part to help create one for them, to make the transition as smooth as possible. Because I know I would want someone to do that for me.

This photo on top is of Linda with Emilee showing some of the caregivers how to even handle, care, use these new super cute cloth diapers. They were very attentive!

As well as the new cloth diapers, they received new cribs, mattresses, diaper pads, sheets and even some new crib toys. This baby is Ogice, she is really enjoying the new toy. To be honest, it was really fun to watch her try to figure this new "thing" out. She is precious.

Then there were new changing tables and organizing bins, new wipes, etc... You can only imagine what we all had as new mothers. We tried to create all the tools needed for them to best care for the children. We even went through how to use the changing tables, etc... Overall, it was a fun morning. I not only love these orphan children, but I am growing to see the caregivers perspective as well, and it is not an easy perspective to behold.

I pray you might find yourself helping someone out of an old rut and into a new one, but your help is with grace and love and encouragement.

it's my blog

2011-02-13T22:15:00.000-08:00

Just fyi....

All three of my kids are sick today and missing school with a fever and headaches..... ugh....

AND, track practice starts today as well, so I am back to coaching the long distance runners at Hillcrest, at least until we move after the school's spring break.

It's my blog, so I figured I could give random info. on it, don't you think, right?

HAPPY VALENTINE"S DAY!

found wanting

2011-02-12T22:13:00.000-08:00

I have been found wanting in the area of snapping photos of things of which I am participating. Please know though that John and I have been busy.

First to explain these two photos. At Miango Rest Home (where our staff retreat took place) we had a murder mystery party. Where I was not able to actually get a picture of just John and I, I was able to get one of our name tags. However, I was an excellent show girl and I am sure most of you can picture John as a convincing Elvis. Our two characters were in love and Elvis was going to propose to Lucy any day... :)

Then the snap below was of some beef that we had eaten while there. There is a butcher on site where you can purchase some of your own beef or pork if you so desire.

Some other things that have taken some time are John and I were on a dating panel for the Senior Bible Class at school. Will and Theresa joined us as well as a nigerian couple. It was fun answering their questions as to our dating journey. I think the hardest part for John and I was remembering honestly what happened over 16 years ago..... phew, the memory is the first to go, right? It was a lot of fun though to be a part of how this younger generation views dating and marriage. Especially in a culture that doesn't focus or promote it.

Then yesterday, Sami went to her good friend, Moses, birthday party. Her whole class was invited and she had a great time playing with her classmates. She was the only baturi girl there and it phased her none. I actually love these mom's in this grade. I went early to pick her up and sat there with most of them just chatting and laughing about our children and their age. I will miss this "set" of women maybe most of all. They have literally held my hand in this culture and helped me understand how things are done in "nigeria"..... for example... I was told when I went to the party that "this is Nigeria, you make enough food to feed the whole community, not just the kids. So, please, sit down and have a meal with us." as my friend proceeded to hand me a HUGE heaping plate of jollof rice, chicken, cake and a mineral. It was good, but they definitely don't take "no" for an answer.

Anyway, just some things that we have been involved in, culturally, yet no pictures to prove it. I guess you will just have to believe me. Have a blessed Sunday.

timing

2011-02-09T22:01:00.001-08:00

I was not looking forward to the day when the children from OLA would know that our family was leaving.

Yesterday was that day. The week prior my mom and I had told a couple of the caregivers. Probably in hopes they would pass it on in the best way. For two years, the kids and I have pretty consistently visited every week. This courtyard is second nature to us and definitely an extension of our own home environment.

This whole time I was thinking about how they have become a part of our inner workings of life here. It just dawned on me yesterday we had also become a part of theirs. The younger ones might not understand until they realize we just stopped coming. The three older ones know and understand, but don't quite "get it" and not that I think they should. It is just hard for me to grasp all sides of this relationship.

I am still working on it, but in the meanwhile, please pray for these little guys. My prayer is they will see very physically, God's care and love in these next coming months as part of their landscape will be forever changed as well.

"We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you have become so dear to us." I Thess. 2:8

We truly love these children and are grateful for our time.

africa landscapes that I will miss

2011-02-08T22:12:00.000-08:00

These are just the beginning of some photos that when I look at them and picture the real thing, I can feel super nostalgic.

I am not even gone yet but I miss seeing these everyday. Does that make me kind of weird? Maybe. Bummer.

far to go yet one of His own

2011-02-07T22:21:00.000-08:00

I have been thinking about what pictures to bring your way or some deep insight that I could share that has been revealed to me, but truthfully, the only thing that has come to my attention over and over again is how far I have to go.

How far I have to go to grasp ministry in a third world country. How far I have to go in understanding relationships and how to serve those I care about the most. How far I have to go in the Bible of comprehending Old Testament characters and how my life can better bring God glory by gleaning truths from their lives.

BUT, with all this knowledge of how far I have to go, I end up coming to another truth and that is that Jesus loves me so much that He doesn't leave me at "how far I have to go" but brings me to my completeness and fullness in Himself so God only sees me as holy, refined and as one of His own.

Not only should I be living out this truth, but I should be believing this truth. There is a verse that has stuck out to me lately and I think it resembles where I am right now.

Exodus 33:15

"Lord, if your presence does not go with us, do not lead us up from this place."

Yes, looking at this now, this verse seems random compared to what I shared above. The thing is that I feel compelled to cling to the Lord more than ever and I am distracted in my clinging. I am refusing to leave the place before I have truly MET with Him. I am at a place of seeing how far I have to go.... but I want to live in a place that I am one of His own. It takes me completely clinging at this season of my life to believe what is already true of me.....

Anyway, no pictures today, just thoughts. I never know whether to use this blog for ministry, personal and/or family.... so with that, here is today.

staff retreat

2011-02-05T23:13:00.001-08:00

We just returned from our first Nigeria, Back 2 Back staff retreat. We left on Thursday morning and just returned yesterday afternoon. The days were great, with a fun mix of meetings, relaxation and some fun activities.

You have heard me mention before about Miango Rest Home. That is where we spent our days. The picture below is of the two new horses they have added to this retreat center. Looks calming, doesn't it?

I will post more later as I gather my thoughts and photos of this fun weekend. Until then, I leave you with this horse photo. If the picture was not in context, you might think that we aren't even in Nigeria...

the fellowship of women

2011-02-02T20:36:00.001-08:00

Can I introduce you all to my last nigerian bible study with the women who have held my hand, in some ways, while living here in Jos.

From the left: my mom/Eileen, Rose, Evelyn, Linda, Emilee, Theresa, Planglan, Juliana and then on the floor is Stella.

They have become my fellowship of women who I trust with questions needing to be answered, with a deeper understanding of living with generations of crisis, trusting God with raising children and with just loving and laughing and crying and praying together.

We are studying David as our final time together (at least with me anyway) and how God had David "rub shoulders" with certain people to become the man he became later known as "A man of God's own heart." I strongly believe that God wanted me to rub shoulders with these ladies because He had things He wanted me to learn first hand from these Godly women. There were things in my life that have become refined due to these ladies choosing to walk beside me in life.

I thank God every time I think of them!

baby Ibocuku

2011-02-01T21:25:00.001-08:00

Part of me wants to say, "Here we go again!"..... But, that wouldn't be fair. I want to introduce you to a new baby at OLA. We met him yesterday while visiting the home in the afternoon. When I asked questions about him, I think the caregiver and I were getting our questions and responses confused. She communicated that he is five days old, but I am guessing he is not THAT young. His name is Ibocuku (eee bo choo koo).

His story is that his mother gave birth to him, didn't want him, gave him to a friend who didn't feel safe during the crisis to take care of a newborn. SO, Ibocuku is staying at OLA for only three months until the public elections are over and things have "settled down." When those months are gone, the friend will come back and get him and then care for him in safety.

Join me as we start another chain directly to heaven of prayer for another little orphaned life. The good news: he is healthy and already in the main care room (not the hospital), and God has perfectly knit this baby in his mother's womb and loves and cares for him more than we all do.

The hard reality: another little baby who is starting his life already with the circumstances that might follow him the rest of the days of his life.

Please pray for his life, safety and his future.

alone

2011-02-01T04:16:00.000-08:00

I just want you to know that officially, today, my children went back to school. It has been about six or seven weeks that they have been home from holiday break and election break.

Do you see that picture on the right? That is me, enjoying a brief moment all alone in my house. All by myself. Now some would not enjoy the silence of the alone time..... AHHHH, but ME, I love it.

Have a great day. Ah, bummer, I hear some people coming to the door.... gotta run.

wedding dash by sarah

2011-01-30T06:54:00.000-08:00

A few days ago me and my family went to the Hitchcock's for dinner. We had chips,chicken and salad. It was good. Anyway me and my sister found some wedding dresses. And Mrs. Hitchcock let us try some on. She was very kind to us. My dad said"You won't be in a dress like that for another 35 years." but i know he is kidding. This is what became of it:

contentment vs. change

2011-01-29T22:33:00.000-08:00

John and I have been talking a lot lately about the growth in the last two years.

The growth in us, the growth in the plants around our house and just the changes we have seen here in Jos. AND yet, when I look around, the village still looks the same. Not everywhere, mind you, but most places.

These photos are just some shots that were taken the first six months here, but they could have been taken yesterday. That is a strange reality for me.

It is strange because if it hasn't changed in the last two years, when has it changed? Is change necessary for growth? Is growth necessary? Maybe I am asking the wrong question, I don't know. Maybe change in a visual sense is a separate issue.

Maybe even though these photos haven't appeared to have marked any landscape changes, we can hope and pray that the lives of these individuals have changed. Maybe a growth so real that even if nothing changes (circumstances) ever, their walk is vibrant and alive and their maturity so deep that they have "learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want" Phil. 4:12.

Maybe because I have had the ability to change my circumstances when I have wanted, I haven't been forced to grow in this area. I have a feeling John and I are going to be getting a crash course in CONTENTMENT 101 (not that I am comparing the village life to our move). I also don't believe changing things is a reflection of our contentment level. It is just me considering things around me and applying it to my personal life. Maybe a bit of unveiling from the Lord.

new definition of a "meat market"

2011-01-27T21:51:00.000-08:00

I know I have shown you a similar picture before about where I purchase our minced beef, but when I went yesterday the man really tried to get me to buy the tail.

Do you see it, up above? Gross..... He promised me that I would love the flavor it makes in a soup. When I got to the stand he asked, "Mrs. Corrie?" I knew at that moment, I was in trouble. Anyway, I didn't buy it, but I did like the photo. Maybe I should learn to live a little, huh? I could have bought the hooves right next to the tail as well. Ughh.....

Enjoy your food today!

joy of a growing life; sorrow for the loss of a life

2011-01-25T22:15:00.000-08:00

Do you remember me talking to you about Susanna who was new at OLA?

Her mom had gone crazy and she was taken from her so she could live a more "normal" life for a four year old.

I am excited to say that she is growing and laughing and learning and becoming more childlike than I have ever seen her. We have had a couple of teams come through who have shown her amazing unconditional, Christlike love and we, as a staff have tried to consistently tend to her and pray for her.

When my mom and I went Monday morning, she came running up offering HUGE hugs to anyone who was willing to accept them (which we all were, just in case you were wondering). Sami gave her a little butterfly mask and she was so precious walking around with it on (the photo above is her in the mask).

On a sadder note, do you remember baby Joseph? He came over from the hospital side about the same time as Susanna was brought in. He passed away a few weeks ago now. His strength did not endure time and His Creator saw it fit that they see each other face to face. I am so grateful for all of you who prayed for his little body. We were hopeful for what was to come, and I guess in the end, we are eternally aware of his "better home".

The nurses fed him one morning and laid him down for a nap. When they returned to wake him up from his nap, he had passed away. We are not real certain of what exactly took place, but we do know that his burial was that of an orphan. No one came from his "family", but the Sisters prayed over him and sent the body away to be buried. It was during the crisis so none of us were able to attend, but I was reminded at the end of his short-lived life, that baby Joseph had nothing to brag about in this world, not even a biological family, but I am very CERTAIN that none of that matters now. I think I need to sit on this thought for my own life. He only leaves behind those of us he touched. AND, he touched my life. I am thankful that I was able to know him.

this is what we are here for

2011-01-24T23:49:00.001-08:00

The other day our family went to the education center to spend some time inside before classes started this week. John made a comment to me communicating this is why we are here, and why we do what we do. It was a bigger realization that we are a body working together for the whole healing (both spiritual and physical) of the orphan here in Jos.

Here are some pictures of the inside of the education center. This is just one of the two rooms that this building consists of; however, it is the one that for now, is being most used.

The top photo is of the reading corner. Isn't it cute? Pray for those children that will be using it to read and broaden their minds.

Then, it is the main desk where the initial learning will take place. Theresa started this week with her first classes. They will be learning english. Once that is established they will move on from there.

The last photo is of their cubbies. Remember when we were little and we had cubbies? I cannot wait to see what this place looks like in ten years.... imagine the children that would have come through this school to learn.

House Of Cards-from GUS

2011-01-23T22:05:00.000-08:00

A couple of days ago Sami and me got bored and started building pyramids out of cards.

First I tried An easy one just two cards at the bottom and then I did three cards at the bottom. After that I did four cards at the bottom and barely made it before my mom hit it down.

I kept trying to build one with five cards under it but it would keep falling down.

The reason this is short is because my mom is encouraging me to do a blog. I don't really want to do one because I have homework to do, and I want to finish it.

So I am sorry for how short it is.

from Sami

2011-01-20T22:40:00.001-08:00

It is Friday morning and after writing this blog I am going to be doing home school.

We're doing home school because there is a crisis and the school is being used for election reasons, that is why they shut down Hillcrest.

My mom is helping us, I have tons of math. I am so tired of all the work.

Oh I have a question.

This question is where there is a missing word. ok here it is:

The state of Ohio was the __________ state in the Union. I'm asking you this question because it is for my homework.

It is ok. I asked my mom and if no one knows it is ok because I can leave it blank.

SAMANTHA Guckenberger

these are the days to remember

2011-01-19T22:08:00.001-08:00

Yesterday the kids, my mom and I went to OLA to just visit. To be honest, it was the best morning I have ever spent there. Below is our OLA family. I have grown to love these children almost as much as my own. I feel completely overwhelmed by how much they have taught me and about leaving them when we move.

While most of us were sitting in the warm sun spot in their courtyard, I sent Daniel (the 10 year old boy) with my camera to take photos of the new renovations made with the last team.

It was so fun to see the new curtains in the older girls room. I loved them. I feel as if it gives them dignity to live in a room that looks age appropriate.

I don't know if you remember me communicating how some family held an OLA baby shower to fund a baby room makeover. This makeover is being done in phases, so as the team provided new curtains, new paint, new signs and mosquito nets for all the cribs, we await new cribs, mattresses, cloth diapers and other little items.

It will be beautiful, it already is so beautiful (relatively speaking). Our thought has always been... let's not just make a room that is good enough for an orphan, but let's make this room good enough for my child. That is our desire as a ministry. That is our standard - not an "it will do" mentality, but is this good enough for a child of God?!

Gosh, I am really going to miss these faces. Lucky and Daniel are the last two snaps here. I couldn't resist seeing how much they bundle their babies so they don't get sick. Cute little face poking out of the layers, right?

a life lesson

2011-01-18T23:43:00.001-08:00

One of the things John and I have learned is the idea of "living the life given and not the life planned." The truth is I just read the above quote from a friends blog :), and I have been chewing over that thought a ton since it first filled my mind. It is really true, especially living here. The picture below is the reality that our power or "light" is not on very much. So, we live in the darkness in our home some. (Now come one, don't get me on the spiritual side of living in the light. We know that, but day in and day out living life, darkness)

So today's snap reminds me that John and I and our children have learned to live this life that has been given, even if it wasn't what we had thought or planned. Amen!!

in the beginning

2011-01-17T22:48:00.000-08:00

Well, here we are.... flying over to Jos, Nigeria, two years ago.

I am amazed to see how we (really, our children) look so different! That flight is almost a blur to me yet at the same time, it feels like yesterday.

The next photo is Jason and John making our first breakfast - peanut butter sandwiches and bananas.... I am at a point where I just might be done with those things... :)

I do remember walking into our home and seeing what we had and didn't have.... probably the biggest shocker and yet at the time, feeling "up" for the adventure."... Who would have thought I would learn how to home cook in this little bare kitchen?!

Then, this last picture is of the first fellowship dinner Emilee through for us, about two days later. I was so tired and these people were so kind, yet I was clearly feeling "on the outside". Now, these same people are a part of our strength here in Jos. I am so grateful for them.

It is strange to think about how foreign everything felt in the beginning. None of it is now, of course, I just wonder as we head back to the USA if life there will feel foreign, or at least maybe for our children. YIKES.... weird thought.

Okay, just a little walk down the first three days of life here.....

mile deep friendships

2011-01-15T23:01:00.001-08:00

Yesterday we had dinner with some good friends. As the woman and I were hanging out we started talking about ministry areas and I started sharing about how our ministry desires to go a mile deep verses a mile wide.

As I started reflecting on that, I realized that I think I am like that as well with friendships. I enjoy people and relationships, so I know friendships take on a variety of sizes and shapes and different ones meet different needs. But, gosh, when John and I have discovered that one of our friendships has gone a mile deep, we are richly blessed. This family is one of those for us.

We enjoyed a nice grill out with some yummy food, but what really nourished my soul was the friendship and conversation. I need that really. People that we can just be "us" with and enjoy the time. We have been blessed with a few friendships like that since our two years here and for that we are grateful. But, for this moment, let's consider these friends right here to the left.

The photo on top is of the ladies/girls putting together some dough balls to create bread sticks (bannock is the official name) and the one below is of the guys grilling our sausages and the bannock bread. It was a beautiful day. What a gift we have been given with this family.

and the reflections begin

2011-01-14T22:35:00.000-08:00

I cannot believe this picture below doesn't feel foreign, nor out of place. This is where we have called home for the last two years. I will miss this type of living.

Well, I leave in about three months from Jos, Nigeria Africa and I know most of you know by now, that I am a serious reflection girl. I cannot help that I preprocess things.... it is just a matter of who I am.

Good news: When it is time to say goodbye, I am done and have made purposeful moments with people I care about! No regrets!

Bad news: People have to put up with my "oh my gosh, do you realize that in four months I will be home?" every day.... :)

But, the truth is one of my roles here in the ministry is a debriefer. What I do is take people through a circle of living, in a sense. We talk about reflections and how that breeds changes and those changes will breed different action steps... well, those different action steps will breed different experiences which then bring you back to different reflections.... you get the idea?

Well, it is time for my reflections to begin of Africa. The truth is I don't want to miss out on what things have changed me, or my husband or my kids. So, if you are going to continue to follow along, you will be catching reflections of our time here. How we have changed which will make us different people living in the States when we come back.

I say this because those of you whom we have loved over the last six years on the mission field, that live in the States, I warn you. We are changed people, with different responses than when we first left. Be ready for different Guckenbergers and please give us grace to live those changes out.

Gosh, above is where I buy all my fruits and vegetables. If not this one, then another one almost just like this. I cannot imagine going to a grocery store anymore for everything. I might enjoy that again :).... (kind of)

Igmin Kibe Education Center

2011-01-12T22:29:00.000-08:00

Igmin Kibe Education Center means "Children of the Kingdom". This is the name of the new Education Center that was dedicated a couple of days ago. These ten students below are the representatives for the future generation of the Kissayhip village. These are the actual students that will begin taking english classes with Theresa (the only white woman) and with Esther (to the left of Theresa). We are all hopeful and proud and prayerful for these ten as they embark on a new vision of themselves. Please join us in prayer for these guys.

The picture below is the actual "ribbon cutting" part of the celebration. It really was exciting to see the first fruits of the plans of what this land can hold. God is faithful and we give him all praise and glory.

Okay, now after this part of the morning, we ended with some village dancers! It was a riot to see the actual village people watch these guys. Every dance move and performance showed on their faces. They were great and it was a treat to join in with the people we serve on a tradition that they don't even celebrate as much anymore themselves. What a reminder that we all come from the same God, even if our backgrounds are drastically different!

Will went up on the rocks and got this ariel view shot of the village around the dancers, celebrating the moment.

As if this day hadn't held enough of activity, that in the end, we finished with some vendors on the compound. When we pulled up, John had picked some up and had it all spread out. It was super fun to bless these vendors (whom we now call friends) and at the same time allow the groups to look for some items that might remind them of their time here in Nigeria. However, I don't think they could find any little trinkets to remind them of my kids and my cooking or of the dancers themselves, but hey, the markets cannot hold everything. :)

This is the last blog entry of the education dedication center. I know it was split up over three days, but I tell you what.... It was one of those days that you look back and see how lots of parts and lots of people playing their roles can really make for a fun-filled day full of God's blessings. I am grateful to have been a part of it.

Have a great day!

the party beforehand

2011-01-11T22:42:00.000-08:00

Before the actual dedication there was a party, truly! Lots of stations where different team members and staff were positioned. This first picture was just plain cute of this little boy. It is winter here in Jos, so this mom wanted to come to party, but felt it was too cold for her boy, unless she got him all bundled up. I couldn't resist. I feel a bit panicky that he cannot actually breathe, but by the end of the day, he was still having fun. :)

The swing set was in full working order, and getting a ton of use. They LOVE it, much more than we had anticipated.

Gus took my camera up the rocks to get an ariel shot of what was going on. From here it really doesn't look like a lot of people were there, but on eye level, it was packed. We were guessing there were at least 500 people that came.

There was a station of pipe cleaners and all the things that can be done with them. Glasses tended to be the favorite. I guess they all want to be like me! :)

Sarah was at a station of painting nails. Boys and girls wanted this done and when it was complete, I do believe they walked with a little bit more confidence. I mean, who wouldn't with new glasses and your nails done, right?

There were other stations like face painting, jump ropes (never really caught on, hmmm..., maybe next time), coloring books and football/soccer. It was great to be a part of the energy that was building before the ceremony. Tomorrow I will show you the dedication and the party afterwards.... OH YES, there was a party afterwards!!

food prep

2011-01-11T06:52:00.001-08:00

Yesterday, we had a dedication for the new education center. Truthfully, the day was so fun and blessed and full of so much.... that I am actually going to break it up into a few blogs. So, the first one is going to be all about the food.

The picture above is of Sami and I helping our friend Evelyn prep the food to feed the village. The menu? Jollof rice and stewed beef. Three huge coolers were filled with the rice and one HUGE cooler was holding 620 pieces of stewed beef.

Above is Gus and Sami stirring the rice (or was this the beef?- both were cooked over a fire pit). I know, I know, we are becoming so nigerian in our cooking style.... I don't know what we will do when we return? Maybe I will make sure our next home has a place where I can whip up a fire pit verses the traditional oven :).

Our heart was that each and every child would be served a meal. Once we realized the people who came out for the dedication, we immediately started praying for the Lord to multiply our food like he did the loaves and fishes. In the end, we had no rice left, but we did have some extra meat... hmmm... amazing what God really can do, isn't it? The photo above is just ONE portion of the line of children who waited very patiently for their turn to receive a lunch. We know we served at least over 300 children. Thank you Lord for your provision!

The inside, where the people were passing out the food for those waiting.

people

2011-01-09T23:12:00.001-08:00

These are the people who are joining us now and we are so blessed by the array of personalities and locations they represent: North Carolina, Wyoming, Florida, California, and Ohio. Only God could orchestrate all of these people to do what needed to be done this week.

I am leaving now for the dedication of the education center. We are so excited. I will show pictures tomorrow. Have a great day.

work day

2011-01-08T01:45:00.000-08:00

To begin the 2011 year, we have two teams here helping us move forward with many projects: the completion of the education center, the completion of some playground swings, moving forward on a water tower for one of the children's homes that has recently received a borehole, a widow outreach, tons of prayer and play, a new baby room and new curtains all around, and one full pledge jumpy castle fun day (pictures to be seen later).

I think about all the people who come to encourage and serve and I am overwhelmed with gratitude as I realize how much we really just cannot do on our own. We are blessed by those of you who join in what God is doing through Back2Back Ministries on behalf of orphan care in Jos, Nigeria. These photos are just some that I took at the end of yesterday's workday.

These shots don't include even half of what took place yesterday, but it was what I captured and we are thankful for the work day. So much is moving forward. I cannot wait to see the end product. Keep posted. God Bless and have a great Saturday.

birds of the air, or kind of...

2011-01-06T21:32:00.001-08:00

I know that after the last blog entry that was deep and sincere and full of information that there might be this expectation that this next blog entry will be just as deep and sincere, but today, I just wanted to highlight a few birds that I have recently seen around our usual living places.

This first photo is of a family of peacocks walking in and out of the bakery I go to for our bread. They are pretty aren't they? I still get floored that these birds are in random places whether there is a bunch of people or it is out in the village.

Then, the other day I went to the pool with my kids and there were these two birds literally looking at themselves in a reflection window. For hours the two of them sat their squawking at each other and themselves as they moved from the left and to the right gazing at their reflection. You have to admit, cool in-flight picture, huh?

Then the last one is right down our street. These vultures (which are not super common, at least not from what we have seen) were picking at something for quite awhile. As I looked closer (and hopefully you can see it too), they were eating the remains of a cow. That is a jawbone of a cow to the right of the picture.

a few changes

2011-01-03T06:20:00.000-08:00

Things are changing for us here in a few months. We will be leaving Nigeria in April to report to the US office for a short time (about 4 months). The building project here is starting a little slower than expected so John will finalize the set up of the plans and building program and then we will leave. John has been working closely with a Nigerian Builder training him and setting him up to develop the project here. They have built some small buildings together, several water towers, an Education Center and an Apartment/House, so John could understand his abilities.

Our family will decide where God is leading us next during the 4 months in the US. We have been in the mission field for 6 years and need some time in the US to regroup a little. Please pray for us. We have come to learn that there are some missionaries who are called and then they stay and build up... then there are others who are called to equip and encourage and then move on... I really have no idea what our future holds, nor whether we will continue with this pattern. But at this point, it has seemed fit for the Lord to use us in the latter, and I am grateful for each and every experience for our family.

Jos has been great for our family. The kids have been attending a school called Hillcrest. A true blessing. It is a private school for Nigerians and Internationals run by missionaries who use curriculum from the US. The kids have at least 4 different nationalities in their classes. It has really made a difference for us that the kids can have a some relationships outside of what we do.
We have been really focused on a specific village outside of Jos. This is where we built the Education Center. We dedicate the Education Ctr this next week and start tutoring orphan children within the month. The teacher is from the US and is really excited about teaching the kids. It is fun to see things come together. The ministry has grown with more international staff and also has hired some more nationals to keep the momentum of moving forward at a high. To be truthful, the ministry is extremely blessed to call these men and women "co-laborers" in Christ. We are really excited about what is taking place here.

This decision has not been an easy one to make; however, we are learning that if the Lord leads us forward, we must obey. It almost doesn't seem like a choiceat all. I realize that for some of you reading this, it might appear "out of nowhere" and yet for others you might have a lot of questions as to our future. We really don't have many answers to these questions or thoughts except we are feeling called to yet another level of trust. As John and I were going through our "moments" of 2010, we were reminded of God's constant provisions and leading and it helped us realize that if He has called and provided for us this far, He will continue.

If you are a friend and/or supporter of ours, we ask that you will join us in prayer during our four month home assignment. Prayers that will help us discern what is next and the wisdom to follow through in a way that is best for our family. We continue to ask and continue to need the provisions that you have allowed us to have. We are not leaving Back2Back, just coming home for a home assignment and then go where the Lord leads. We NEVER, please hear us say, NEVER take for granted all the ways that God has used eachof you to encourage and equip us to encourage and equip others. Where we cannot repay you we pray that the Lord repays you ten fold in heaven as you will see the fruit of your ministry played out in our lives and the lives of others. If you are just someone who happens to read our blog and you are interested in what is being communicated. Please contact us through our email with specific questions you might have at corriejohn@yahoo.com. We are blessed to call you each friends.

fellowship of the unashamed

2010-12-30T22:51:00.000-08:00

Some pictures are striking to me, no matter where I see them or how I see them. Take this van that I was following on my way to OLA. I realized that it was carrying a casket after a few minutes, and then I realized the size of the casket. It is the size for a small child.

Gosh, then I realized that for some people, New Year's day is a celebration, and for others, it is just another day trying to live a life that honors the Lord. Even if each day holds tragedy and maybe the burial of a child.

I don't know if you see clearly that there is a verse written in hausa on the window of the van.

It is Romans 1:16

"I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile."

This verse tends to become more real to me due to the nature of where we live. This "not ashamed of the gospel" carries more weight here as religious differences are played out daily. I pray for the New Year for all of you. I pray that it holds blessings from the Lord and a fruitful ministry in your heart. You can pray for us as these caskets are so real. You can pray for the ministry to the orphan to be clear and understood by those whom we are trying to minister.

But, more than anything, I pray this new year finds you feeling resolved in the idea that you are a part of the fellowship of the unashamed.

family day s finally here!!!by sarah

2010-12-30T03:20:00.000-08:00

FAMILY DAY!!! Family day is finally here!

Family day is always the day before a big group comes and then it's work,

work, work for my parents. Most of the time on family days we only watch

tv and play video games or just games as a family. But on family days my

parents are not allowed to make phone calls or work in the office at all.So

today we have family day.

My family has recently seen a black cat around the neighborhood and under

our car. Anyway my dad used to be allergic to cats, especially black cats. So

my dad decided that we wouldn't let it go hungry and starve to death. So we

are now leaving a little bowl of milk out at night for him. It was only tonight that he actually took some!!This is a stretch for my dad. especially since we've never had a single pet in our lives (except Budmar who we had when I was like 2 years old and doesn't count)!!! It's awesome!!!!!

vision. knowledge. integrity.

2010-12-28T21:27:00.000-08:00

"Where there is no vision, the people perish." - Proverbs 29:18

"Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge

without integrity is dangerous and dreadful."

Samuel Johnson

I know that I have shared with you the above verse, but I wanted to show you the "almost finished" education center that has been built in the Kissayhip Village where we (meaning the B2B staff) spend most of our days ministering. This verse is still true for our team and it is the main heart for these Rukuba people.

We want them to gain a vision of something bigger than themselves. We believe this can begin to happen as they begin to gain knowledge and the basic understanding of using the gift of learning that God has given us all as humans. BUT, as the quote from Samuel Johnson communicates, it is not just knowledge, but a life of integrity alongside of the knowledge that brings about a full person.

A life of integrity is a life filled with the basic principles of living for Christ. A vision of living for Christ. So, as you see the two pictures above and you are aware of the building that stands there, please pray. This building represents a lot more to us and a lot more to this village. We see education as something that is not easily given in a land that is filled with people who need a deeper heart for their place in God's kingdom.

everything is fine, just not for these cows

2010-12-26T22:29:00.000-08:00

I was running the other day at Hillcrest when I ran past the old basketball court and saw all the maintenance workers literally chopping up about 5 cows for them to each take some home as a Christmas gift to their families.

If you can see if the first photo, the intestines and the "gut" are hanging out and in the second picture they are skinning it.... ugh.... I tell you what, it was gruesome to watch. BUT, I do know it was a treat for those families.

P.S.

Our Christmas was great and we wanted to share with anyone who has emailed us or been praying for us that we are all okay within our ministry and within our ministry areas of focus. Things have quieted down and we are being wise in where we go. Our prayer is that this new year doesn't show itself to be anything but what the Lord wants and our response is nothing short of bringing Him glory.

Please enjoy your freedom, giving thanks to God and praying for believers all over the world who are acting in obedience, trusting God moment by moment. Have a blessed day.

Merry Christmas - A Son is Born!

2010-12-25T01:13:00.000-08:00

I don't necessarily have anything Christmasy to say on this beautiful morning, except today I am grateful for my Nigerian family (the Back2Back family) that we can celebrate Christmas with and feel the intimacy we would even if we were "home."

The picture above is one of the gifts my kids opened up this morning. Do you remember the three monkeys "hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil?" Well, we bought some african carvings of these and picked a bible verse to go with each child that suited their strengths and weaknesses. Sami was "Hear no evil," Gus was "See no evil," and Sarah was "Speak no evil" They are perfect for their personalities.

Above, are just some of the things we have been doing during this Christmas season. Enjoying friends and fellowship and a little pool time. I don't have a picture of our Christmas eve plans, but we had a euchre tournament and it was so fun to completely lose to our friends (we were the ultimate losers in our sweet game :)).

Again, nothing major to share except Merry Christmas and we pray your day is Blessed and you are reminded of Jesus who was born for man to live. Amen!

good fellowship

2010-12-22T22:45:00.000-08:00

A couple of nights ago, Rev. Batori and his family invited our whole ministry along with the SSE ministry for dinner. That is not necessarily an easy feat to cook for all of us white people.

The picture of our family is with their oldest son, Barnabus. He and John have become quite good friends as their conversations tend to find themselves not only around ministry, but also around relationships (he has a serious girlfriend) and their walks with Christ. We have learned to count him as one of our treasured friends here in Jos.

By the end of the evening we looked back and realized that this family outwardly loves each other in a way that we find familiar and fun. In our experience so far, nigerians don't tend to show affection in front of others. I am not saying that affection isn't found, just not in front of us. So, it was so refreshing to join with them for an evening of joking with one another and good food and just great fellowship all around.

We were grateful for the night and even more thankful for the opportunity to call these nigerians friends.

gimper

2010-12-21T21:24:00.000-08:00

gimper: ... a one man army, one who will lay down his life for a cause or for one

This is the new word I learned yesterday while in our staff meeting. Daniel (Pictured above, the one standing) used this term to describe Emmanuel (the one wearing the black t-shirt). He went on to say that Emmanuel is the one who will be the persecuted, to do what needs to be done for those who need to have it done to (in reference to the orphan child in the village).

This word struck me. It is a small word and at first glance can give the impression for a different definition (I first see the word gimp). So, I asked Daniel more about it. The more he shared with us as a staff the more I was drawn to the idea. Emmanuel is one (and I agree) who would put his own life on hold or on the line to help one who is an orphan in the Kissayhip village. He would "die" for one.

I don't know. I am guessing that I am struck by the idea of laying down your life for one. The importance of one. The importance of Emmanuel and each individual on our staff team. The importance of each orphan we serve, but most of all I am struck with the the most important gimper I know who came as a baby to do what the definition tells us he needed to do for each one of us, Jesus.

What an honor to be a gimper! Thanks Emmanuel for the example!

the larger body

2010-12-19T22:45:00.001-08:00

The other day we had our Christmas Party for the larger body of Back 2 Back Ministries here in Jos, Nigeria. The picture below is of all the workers who work with us personally, or with the buildings, or they work with the groups, etc... It is such a joy to see the Lord bring everyone together for His purposes and for His glory.

Who would have thought two years ago when we moved here that they Lord would grow us to this? It also brings me hope and excitement to see what the next two years holds for this ministry here.

to swim or not to swim

2010-12-18T23:31:00.000-08:00

Yesterday a few of us within the ministry and another family provided a Christmas swim day for some of the older children at OLA.

To be honest, our good friends, the Paynes, had supporters of theirs who gave them money to bless someone in Nigeria who they work with. Anyway, what a gift they gave these children.

It was a beautiful day, the only hiccup we had was that the water was freezing cold. I mean, frigid!! So, as they like to say here, "we tried". A few of us (yes, that means I did get in) did play in the pool while the rest of us just "looked" the part. As you see the

second picture, little Hope had the swimmies, goggles, swimsuit and the squirt gun all on and looked as if she played in the water all day; whereas, she got her feet and legs wet and just enjoyed the playground.

We had a nice beef and jollof rice catered lunch and in the end, our friends brought Christmas gifts for all the children. We were blessed to be a part of it, the kids were blessed with an outing that they had been wanting for such a long time and I pray that the family (who lives in Washington somewhere) who donated the funds, I pray the Lord blesses them as well.

The last photo is of the babies who could not join us. Gus, Cypress and Jordan enjoyed a few

moments of connection before we left with the others.I love these kids!

a christmas day

2010-12-16T02:29:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was a great day full of christmas thoughts. I want to start with the end of the day because Sami and Gus had their Christmas pageant for school. Gus, if any of you know him, is more of a quiet boy with humor that you have to catch, but if you do, he is very funny.

Well, he had a solo and some acting parts. However, Sami was very ill before the event so she and I stayed home (I cannot begin to tell you the sadness in her heart and eyes). BUT, I heard it was a great evening and I also heard that people were so surprised to see Gus standing up there singing his shepherd rap. At least John came home with a short video so I could see and hear him a bit in action.

He is the one on the left, just in case you couldn't tell. :)

And the photo below is of the elementary school pageant setting. Overall, a well done performance.

Now, the first event of the day was all the staff women getting together and baking 75 banana bread loaves to hand out to people in the community who have come alongside our ministry in some way, shape or form.

The first picture was all of us who bakes, however Theresa was taking the photo so she is not in it.

The day was fun. Emilee did a great job organizing the event with different stations partaking in different tasks. Everyone knew their role and played it out well. Of course I haven't eaten any of it, so here is hoping....

I think the overall thing I enjoyed most about yesterday was it was full of Christmas. Baking, fellowship, constant reminders of Jesus's birth by the

ideas of gifts and giving. Songs being sung (or rapped) that points to the Saviour.

I think handing out the banana bread was the topping of christmas. Being able to say hello to people that you might not take every moment to grab, and let them know that we are thankful for who they are in our lives and/or the lives of this ministry to the orphan child.

I pray as the season has started that you too can enjoy the people around you and take the moment to let the know what their friendship means.